Short Stories by Dave

These Short Stories are all set in 1997 which predates personal mobile phones and the necessity to document one's every move to one's friends on social media sites.
Some people may find that the lack of violence and evil means that they do not reflect reality.
However, the point of fiction is to create a place that does not exist in reality. And maybe it is possible to be in business without being nasty

To contact dave please email - davemcalder@icloud.com

Amery

Once upon a time, programming used to be fun

Rev 16

Contents

Tristan

The half gate at the end of the bar had been left open and Tristan could aimlessly watch the bar maid going about her evening work. He sat quietly in the window next to that open end of the bar engrossed in the thoughts he'd come here to think. A get-away from everything normal, and all the usual daily activities that staying at home would entail. And also to escape from all the abnormal activities that going out had engulfed him in.

He'd spent a few hours just watching the tide come in through the mouth of the small harbour, re-floating the small fishing boats and yachts. There were 28 yachts in the harbour, and every single one of them had been comprehensively ignored by everyone who was active on the wharf. Why, he mused did people have a yacht and never sail it? Maybe it was an investment – surely not, or a tax dodge?

But now he was more introspective – what was Casandra up to? Was she really becoming too interested in him? And what was he going to do with Jasmine? They got on so well together, but she was looking for someone a whole lot better off than him. She wanted him for one thing only, and it wasn’t his body – more’s the pity. And then there was his work. Some of this stuff from Julian must surely be illegal, and it was only a matter of time before he landed up at the centre of a scandal or in jail or maybe both.

The bar was quiet now, four locals playing cribbage in the far corner, and a couple of bikers planning the next stage of their road trip, occasionally raising a noisy laugh.

Tristan was still gazing into his beer when the tall well built bloke threw the door open.

“ 'Am egg an' chips” he demanded.

She apologised that the kitchen has just closed for the night and she thought that the chef may have already gone home

“ 'Am egg an chips” bellowed big bloke, more aggressively thumping the bar top.

“Sorry sir”, began the barmaid as Tristan looked up from his own interests

Big bloke was staring intently at the standard size barmaid

“You're not listening. I want food”

He lunged out across the bar and grabbed her by the arm shaking her violently and tearing her blouse. She squeaked rather than screamed and the bar manager, previously doubling as the chef, came out from the side kitchen

“Are you the chef?”

“What's the problem?”

“Are you the goddammed chef!?”

“Sometimes. What’s the problem”

Big bloke lost it

“You lying turtle! You said he’d gone home”

He grabbed a bottle off the bikers table and cracked it on the bar scattering shrapnel in all directions before swinging it forward towards her.

Tristan was out of his chair. He grabbed her arm from behind pulling her away from big bloke and pushing her to the floor behind the bar. The bikers made a hasty exit as big bloke turned to the manager. He backed away, but only as far as a kitchen knife that was used for slicing lemons.

The barmaid was getting up. Stay down, Tristan commanded as quietly as he could as he picked up a chair. Blade against bottle was anybody's win. Chair was a better bet as it was wider, defending against side swipes, and had a longer reach. It was also less likely to do any permanent damage.

Manager was now front of house. “Bin the blade, grab a chair” commanded Tristan, and was relieved that there was a positive response.

It was no real contest as big bloke was pinned between the 8 chair legs like a cage operated by a tag team. Tristan could see big bloke checking out the door.

Manager suddenly flipped his chair up, knocking the broken bottle from big blokes hand and sending it flying across the room, smashing somewhere behind the bar. Tristan shuffled forward, pushing big bloke towards the door, and then just as suddenly turned his chair to create a gap. Like an animal released from a trap, big bloke bolted for the exit, ripping the door open and bundling through it.

Tristan lowered his chair looking around at the returning peace. Somewhere sometime the crib players had vanished, maybe out through the loo rather than the main door. Another woman had appeared from the kitchen, and the barmaid had resurfaced from the floor behind the bar peeking up nervously like a cartoon.

Tristan quietly set his chair at the table and made to resume his drinking and contemplation in that order.

“Time to shut up shop”, announced manager without word of a thank you “before owt else ’appens”

Tristan finished his beer slowly. It had been a long time since he was last out of a bar.

The barmaid had got her coat and picked up a small envelope from behind the spirit bottles.

“Thanks” she said weakly as they got to the door at the same time.

Tristan smiled, and shrugged “You ok?”

“Scared” she said, just managing a momentary thin smile “Do you think he's still around? He might be waiting”

“Maybe. But I doubt it. I expect you just need a drink to calm your nerves down a bit”

“I doubt there’s much still open”

“Big bloke’s probably gone to another pub”

“We could walk all the way across town. Less likely to meet him”

“Curry house has got a licence” offered Tristan.

“Yes, but only if you order food”

“Yeah, but you don't have to eat it”

“She raised another thin smile and nodded”

Tristan introduced himself.

“I'm Vicki” she replied in a surprisingly educated accent.

He ordered up a large Cobra, double vodka and tonic and a small chicken madras. They got through the drinks and another round before the curry arrived, but the Indian staff didn't seem to be too concerned.

“You been working there long?” asked Tristan

“Only a few days” she paused “I used to work in a bar when I was at Uni. It's the kind of thing like riding a bike that you don't forget even if you get a bit rusty”

“I'm guessing you didn't take a degree in brewing studies”

She laughed, relaxing just a little. “No, Medieval History.”

Tristan fed in the questioning looks, and the odd direction filter and Vicki talked for over an hour. They'd nibbled at the madras, and were both surprised to find they'd eaten it all.

Vicki had opened up a bit. The reorganisation at her work had left her working for someone who wouldn't leave her alone.

“It was waring me out, apart from not being able to think long enough to do anything. Him hitting on me maybe 60 times a day I got so fed up with it. So I said one more time and I'm walking out the door and never coming back”

“So, you're running away”

“Yes, I guess”

“You do know you can't run away from yourself”

“But you can run away from the situation you got yourself into. And you can take a break to work out how to get yourself out of it and how you want things to be. But hey, you haven't said much this evening”

“No, I thought you were doing such a good job of talking, I didn’t want to interfere”

“Oh, I’m sorry I guess I just wanted to tell someone about it”

“And anyway” Tristan continued “you don't learn anything by talking”

Vicki look puzzled “Yes you do. Its good to talk”

He shook his head “No, you only learn things by listening. But anyway, it's getting late. Time I walked you home”

Vicki shrunk into herself “Tristan, I'm scared. I’m sure I've seen that guy in the bar before, maybe he knows where I live”

“I’ll be with you all the way. And make sure you’re safely locked inside… No? Ok. What about a friends place?”

Vicki shook her head “I don't have any friends around here. That’s one reason I came”

“There’s loads of hotels around here, but, then, I can’t imagine you’d get checked in at this time of night to any but the most expensive”

“You’re right. I’ll just have to risk my room. But I can’t imagine I’ll sleep. What do I do if he bangs on the door?”

“Look, Vicki, the only other option is my place. He can’t possibly know where I live. We can go back there. It's pretty small, but otherwise I'm out of ideas”

She looked over and to Tristan’s surprise she nodded in resignation.

He took her hand as they walked slowly round the bay. This was not the plan, he kept reminding himself. The plan is to de-clutter your life, not make it more complicated as he slipped his arm round her shoulder climbing the steeper incline towards the cliff

“Ouch” she grimaced “woe, that hurts”

“Was that me?” he questioned

“I don't think so, but there's something not right with my shoulder”.

Two flights of stairs and we're there he announced at they approached a large Victorian house that had seen better days, perhaps 30 years ago.

“I've got a room on the second floor. Pain getting up there, but a great view over the bay”

She smiled back at him

“I'd much rather be here than alone at my room”

Tristan wanted to tell her that this wasn’t the plan. This was not his intention when he took on the guy with the bottle. He formulated the sentence but somehow, he just failed to say it

“That guy's really spooked you”

“Yes, I've seen him before. He’s been to the pub yesterday or the day before, I’m sure.”

Tristan threw open the door and she walked across the room to the window.

“Wow, that's quite some view, the whole bay, and most of the promenade”

“Yes, there are 23 shops on that seafront, all selling total garbage. I have no idea why anyone would ever buy any of it. Souvenir? If that's what reminds you of your holiday here you must have had a pretty lousy time”

She giggled.

“Well,” he continued “have you ever bought anything like that?”

“No” she admitted, “But there must be loads of folks that do, otherwise those shops wouldn't be here. They'd go bankrupt”

“I came to the conclusion that they were just run as hobbies and to have a good snigger at anyone who actually spent any money”

Vicki giggled a bit more. It was easy being with him and she started to relax as he turned on the radio, quietly, as she sat down on the bed.

“Need to take a look at that arm of yours” he said seriously.

“What! But I assumed we were...”

“Can't wait, but we can't have you seizing up if I give you a cuddle.

He sat down beside her and started to peel back her torn sleeve.

“I think this blouse has copped it's whack. I'm guessing this is where big bloke grabbed hold of you. Hmm oh dear”

“What's up with it”

“There’s the good news and the bad news. The good news is its not life threatening. At least not yet”

“What d’you mean ‘not yet’?”

“The bad news is that you have a large piece of glass embedded in your arm. That was the problem when I touched it, I guess I pushed it farther in”

Tristan reached up for his leather case and took a small canvas folder from the side pocked and unzipped it.

She looked shocked

“Medical kit, Y’see, I’m a guy that tries to keep a low profile. Something happens - I sort it. I try to keep out of doctor’s surgeries and especially hospitals. They’re so full of sick people. You never know what you might catch! But I put this kit together when I supported a friend of mine on one of his African trips. The kind of place where the nearest doctor is 4 days hike, and the snake venom takes three days to kill you”

“Wow, so you're something of a doctor”

“Not really, just self-preservation”

By now he'd removed the piece of glass and handed it to her carefully, and had taken out a magnifying glass.

“What's that for?”

“To see if there are any tiny fragments left. They need to be removed, or else they could get trapped inside the skin”

“and?”

“And then they could ingrate through the body doing terminal damage if they get stuck in your kidneys or liver or some other vital part”

“Wow, maybe I need to get to A and E”

Tristan shook his head. “You’re not sick. And you don’t want to catch something. Just need to clean this out, then glue you back together”

He cleaned the wound, steri'ed it and finished with a large sticking plaster.

“There. Be good as new in a few days”

“It feels better already. What an end to one hell of a day”

“You look exhausted” he said gently.

“Maybe we should just get a good night's sleep and maybe we can spend some time together tomorrow. You working?”

“No, not till the evening. I’m on at 7”

“I can let you have a T shirt, if you want something for bed”

He threw her a baggy blue T, and could see her eyes were already closing. She turned away from him and replaced her torn top and bra with his T, slipped under the cover and was asleep.

Tristan watched her for a while. By chance or fortune he’d got her all the way into bed, and now…. Asleep. Come on Tris! What else have you come to expect?

He lay awake trying to make some sense of it. This was not on the agenda. He'd gone there to sort out how to resolve his Casandra versus Jasmine versus himself dilemma, And maybe the answer was Vicki, but no, this is just another complication. And if it was Jasmine or Vicki or Casandra or anyone else, then he'd have to make sure he was more the right side of ethics and potentially fatal excursions, not that he’d been invited back after the first one, but that might mean finding another career direction and in any case he'd always promised himself not to get too involved with anyone while he continued with these life threatening activities at home or abroad.

And then it was morning. His head had felt better. Maybe that Cobra was rough stuff.

Vicki woke, smiling questioningly at him.

What was that unasked question. What did that body language mean? How did you find these things out? And how did you relate them to another situation when everyone is so different from each other?

“How’s your arm?”

“So much better. I kinda forgot it was there”

She swapped clothes again, and then it was out into the sunshine to find a street cafe

Breakfast was relaxed. For Tristan it was the same as the previous day - Coffee, oily croissants but without the rancid butter, and a steady stream of excited overweight urchins heading for a day frying in their own fat on the beach.

“We'll have to get you a new shirt”, Tristan said. “Can't have you going around in that one. Folks might think I've been mistreating you”

She laughed “I'll take a walk down to the high street later and see what I can find”

“Yeah”

Tristan paused thinking whether to say what he was thinking. Normally he wouldn’t say too much. Least said, soonest mended seemed to be his motto. But it also meant he felt he’d missed out on so much that might have been. Why was he so circumspect? Why not just say it. Most you’ll get is a smack in the face, and after all, Vicki was not on the original agenda.

“While you're at it” he continued “see if you can find a pretty skirt as well”

She shook her head once and stood up as if to leave. “What! Is that all I am. A pair of legs sticking out the end of a dress!”

“No, don’t be silly! You’re gorgeous”

“Don’t bother with the flattery”

“No, No, You are. You’re gorgeous, you’re intelligent, you’ve got the sense to try to sort yourself out. You want more out of life and you’re prepared to consider how you’re going to do that. And who with. You’re making your own choices and setting your own direction on your own agenda.”

She sat back down again

“Do you really think that?”

“Yes”

“So what’s so special about wearing a short skirt?”

“I didn’t actually say short. But it’s because you’re lovely”

“Even though you didn’t want to do anything even though we were in bed together”

Tristan paused. So that was what she was thinking. And now she’s disappointed. And he’s missed out – again

“No Vicki, it’s a matter of ethics. Sometimes I think I’m pretty short of them at work. I was hoping I might make up for it socially. Last night you were exhausted, and there was a risk of pressing any remaining glass into that wound, if I’d missed any. And I’m not a guy to take advantage when a girl most needs support and protection”

Vicki looked across the table. Maybe she’s misjudged him after all as she felt herself melting just a little

“And this morning” she questioned less aggressively

“This morning, it was breakfast time”

She giggled a little and raised a smile

“But I feel a bit safer with you. I’m still worried about that guy. I don’t want to have to look over my shoulder every three steps to make sure I’m not gonna get bottled”

“I’ll stay with you, for a while anyway. That way he can bottle me instead”

“That’s sweet. Especially since you think I don’t look very nice”

“Vicki, you are gorgeous. But even the most lovely present is even more special when its beautifully wrapped. You know, vibrant colour paper, pretty ribbons, bows. And that’s what a pretty skirt or a dress would do for you. It would make something lovely, something perfect”

She opened a relaxed smile

“Look Vicki, black trousers are only worn by sad, terminal case girls trapped in unhappy and hopeless relationships, sometimes with a guy, sometimes not.. ..Look, over there, the girl with the pram. Looks like she's stuck in a one way relationship with her baby and no one else. Look, there’s another glum overweight soul. Probably on her way to clean loos at a half star hotel. Now here, smiling, looks like she's out for a days fun. Of course, white polka dot fun dress”

She looked quizzical again. “Yes it's like a sun dress, but with more potential.”

“Potential for what?”

“Fun, of course”

She laughed

“But being that short, and low at the top as well, it doesn’t leave very much to the imagination”

“On the contrary. It stimulates the imagination in unprecedented ways”

She laughed again, then looked over at him seriously.

“I can't remember having any fun, or laughter, for weeks. Until now. And I really have to say thank you for that. You around later? I hope”

“I'm not going anywhere very far. I was going to take a walk along to the cliffs at the other end of the bay, then back here in time for more coffee”

“I’m going to take a walk along the high street”

“You be ok on your own?”

She nodded “Yes There should be plenty of people around”

She headed for the shops and he slowly moved off in the direction of the sand.

It was nearly 11 o'clock before she got back. Tristan was two cafes down the street from before, and stood up politely as she approached.

“Hey, come over here” he hailed “Look at this. He was pointing in through a shop window. See that. That must be the ugliest piece of tat I think I've ever had the misfortune to have seen. It's so ugly that you certainly wouldn't buy it for a friend. And that means you got to buy it for someone you don't like. And to give someone something that ugly, you got a loathe them real bad. So the dilemma is, why would you spend that much money on a gift for someone you hate. Like if you could glue it to their mantelpiece and they'd have to suffer it for months, or maybe just blow the house up to get rid of it, then it's conceivable. But there’s a woman just bought one of these. She looked like maybe she didn't have too much money, so it's strange she should spend so much on someone she detests”

“Tristan, you're weird”

Hmm. He nodded

“How'd you get on? Nice top” he continued. “I think the other one was really beyond repair. By the way, how's your arm”.

“Arm? Oh great, no problem. I'd forgotten about it, so I guess it's alright”

“We’ll change the dressing later. Make sure it's healing up ok. Are you going to show me what's in the bag?”

She pulled out a pretty patterned skirt. Oh! That’s nice. You gonna put it on.

“What, here?!”

“Yeah, put it on first, then remove trousers.”

“Yes I know that, but Tristan we're in a crowded cafe. And actually, it's a bit short. I’m not at all sure about it”

“You will look absolutely wonderful in it. And anyway, we’re at the seaside. People have been taking clothes on and off all over the place around here this morning”

“Maybe they do, but I don’t”

“Ok, maybe we go down the steps to the beach, and you'll feel different about it”

“That's the other thing about it. I'm not sure about going up stairs in it”

“You can hold it in toward your legs, if you’re that concerned, and you know there's someone behind you. But, you'll be surprised at how short it really needs to be before its 'too' short”

“You think so?”

“Sure. Look, light travels in straight lines, right. We'll go down to the beach. Then back up the steps. As you're going up I'll use this rod as a straight line to touch your leg, and you'll see just how far up it is”

He picked up a shrimping net from the display outside the shop

“C’mon.”

“Are you not going to pay for that?”

“I'm only borrowing it. I'll put it back in two or three minutes.”

Fortunately there was no one else wanting to use the steps as they climbed back to the cafe one step at a time. Tristan poked the rod in a straight line demonstrating what the line of sight would be from various viewpoints and they arrived laughing and giggling back at their table as he replaced the borrowed rod”

“I'm surprised” she said “I feel much more confident now”

“You should, and in any case, sooner or later you're gonna get unwanted attention. It's just how you handle it”

They continued along the seafront. She certainly noticed the increase in looks, in glances and the occasional stare. Maybe she hadn't done up her zip, or something.

“Look, it's like this. You walk into a room, maybe it's a bar, or a party and some guys raise half an eye and go back to talking about the football. Like, everyone ignores you. Maybe you're wearing a beige top and black trousers and it may be designer, but its still a hideous creation. Anyway, once you’re in the room you go looking for someone to talk to, or get you a drink. And fairly quickly you get to thinking that actually you'll talk to anyone so you don't look like Betty no mates. 'They' are in control. You’re gonna react positively to any approach. Yeah?

Now look at the other way. You're feeling confident, maybe you're concerned your hemline is just slightly too short, you're wearing a new Givenchy. Guys look your way as you go in. Two of three break off from their conversations to head your way. Now you get to choose. This way, you're in control. And what happens next is up to you. The other way you might feel it's something you don't want or nothing at all. This way, you choose”

“Not sure why my friends in 4th form didn't tell me all this”.

“I don't remember being in your 4th form”

“I guess not, I might have noticed, because I went to a girls’ school”

“Did you make it along the beach?”

“No, I didn't get very far. I got distracted. You know, just watching people. If you think I'm weird, you should see what some of these folks are getting up to in their desperation to have fun. But we can take a wander along. Maybe get some lunch at that far café”

They set off walking slowly at the water’s edge, occasionally getting flooded by a wave.

“I must admit, I see what you mean about attention. I've had more looks than I can ever remember, although, I'm not sure I want any of them”

“Maybe not. But at least it's your choice. Reject all if you like, but it's still just up to you”

“I guess it would be the same at work”

“You mean socially at work, or work at work. I mean, I have more offers of work than I can handle. So I get to choose. So in that respect it’s working at work. Make yourself attractive in which-ever way, and you take the lead. Unattractive, you follow because it's not your choice”

“I'm trying to think how to apply this to my situation. I mean its in limbo at the moment. If its left, someone else will do something and that means they’d take the lead. So I need to do something so that I take the lead, right?”
“Well, yes, usually whoever acts first takes the lead, but not always. If you’ve already got a better plan and you’re implementing it, it may not matter what the others do”

“I agree. You see, one part of me says I should just walk out and never return. Another part says I have a responsibility to finish off this piece of work”

They continued to walk as she pondered the issue

“You see, if I just go, I have no where to go to, so I need to find a new job, and just walking out doesn't look good on your cv. And that would leave everyone with a major problem because I'm the only one that knows anything about how this program is written. I may be the only person who knows enough to actually write it”

“No documentation?”

“No, I've not written it yet”

“No surprises there! But whatever else goes wrong, you'd get blamed for too. You know, not being there to defend yourself”

“Yes. So that's looking unattractive as well right now”

“Ok, so what happens if you just go back. Just turn up and carry on as if nothing had happened?”

“I have a major problem to solve, and I'm stuck. Darren, to be fair, might be able to help. But he'd only help me if I, well, you know, gave in to him hitting on me”

“Ok, so you go out with him”

“But it wouldn't stop there. I have a problem with that. I'd feel really used, degraded, kinda worthless. And he’s married. Oh, sorry. Am I making sense?”

“Yes, I can understand that perspective. So you need to solve the problem another way. Why don't we talk it through?”

“What? With you?”

“Yeah”

“But you don't know anything about it”

“True, but that's the best way. That way I ask all the dumb questions that you think are obvious, and that way you find the problem yourself. It's like talking to a dummy. Except this one might talk back”

“But this is about collating all our sources of customer information. Its called the CCI system…”

“…Inventive name…”

“…do you know anything about computer programming?”

“A bit”

“Oh wow, so I don’t need to explain the technical terms”

“Depends how technical terms. I’ll ask when it gets beyond me”

“Ok, so the problem is that my program needs access to the main database. If a user needs access to it they have to pass all sorts of HR and security clearance questions on everything including personality. It's really secure. Then they need a username and password and they can only work from certain terminals. Ok so far? So I've tried writing code to emulate all that so I can get in”

“So you can get in”

“No, so my program can get in. And it has a time out. And user passwords have to be changed every six days, and security are really reluctant give me enough information about it for me to code it properly. And... And every time I run it I get a different error”

She explained a number of the ways she'd tried to get her program to emulate a user to get in through the user dialog routines, but Tristan was already figuring out an alternative while she continued to a natural pause.

“So, what do you think?”

“I think it's time for lunch. The cafes just beyond this beach head”

She sighed “I don't think I'm any farther forward, but thanks for listening”

He ordered up sandwiches, cake and coke, then bought a souvenir notepad and pencil at the kiosk. He could see her looking quizzical, but just led her back towards the beach to eat.

“So what do you think?” she said as she finished her cake.

“What do I think? I think I'm with the most gorgeous girl in the world, and life could only get better if...”

“If what? No, not in the middle of a busy beach!”

“If, I was saying, she kissed me”

“That's not what you are thinking” as she leaned over towards him

“I think your right” he said “we're already getting some strange looks”

She looked up to see two teenage boys staring in their direction with particularly lascivious smirks.

“So, any ideas on my program?”

“Yes”

“Yes? You mean you actually understood what I was talking about? Well, what is it?”

“I'm nervous about being critical. I . .. Oh what the hell. Look, I think you're approaching it from the wrong end. After the user goes through all that physical security, where does the user sign in? I mean which program?”

“That's the main user system”

“And that's a program?”

“Yes, normal COBOL user prog”

“So the signon security validation is in there?”

“Yes, and I've tried to link in to those routines both at run time and by including them as part of my code. And both those methods work. But just once. There’s an algorithm in there that changes things for a user after they've signed in so the next time it’s different. And in any case, there's this issue of passwords needing changed every ..”

“I know, six days. Ok. But what you’re doing is thinking like a user. But you’re not a user, you’re a program. You have to think like a program.”

She looked very puzzled

“Are you familiar with low values?”

“You mean hex zero zero?”

“No, low memory locations?”

She looked at him with a quick shake of her head

“Ok, What I’m talking about is the fixed position addresses way down at the start of memory”

“Whoa! No way. I can’t even guess at what you’re talking about”

“Ok. Now, the numbers I quote here may not be accurate, so we'll have to look them up later, but they’ll serve as an example. You see, the computer itself doesn’t obey the security rules. The computer is not a user. So there’s a whole bunch of addresses down at the bottom of memory that hold the base addresses of everything the computer is doing, or even, could do.”

“Not sure I’m with you?”

“Ok, bear with me, so one of these addresses, I think its hex 40”

“40? From where?”

“40 from the very beginning of memory. Its numbered. You’re program runs in a specific location within the overall memory. Its called a partition which has a specific start address. All the code in your program has a fixed offset from the start of your program, so the computer simply adds the start address of your partition to the offsets in your code to get to where these instructions really are. However, in order to do that it needs to keep track of where each partition starts and it keeps them in a stack and the address of that stack is at hex 16”

“Hex 1 6. 1 6 from where?”
“From the very start of memory, byte number zero. And it has a stack of addresses for all sorts of other basic low level things such as the ports that the hardware is connected to. They’re all held in fixed position offsets from the start of memory, not the start of a partition, so they’re always in the same place. I think the partition address stack is at hex 40”

“Ok, I think”

“Right, so another of these stacks holds the addresses of the data bases. I think it’s at hex 116. What you need to do is access this stack from your routine, chain through to the database name you want, and issue a read”

“You mean, you just bypass the security?”

“Yes. It’s not called user security for nothing”

“So how do you know this type of stuff!”
“Because, that’s what I do. I write programs for people. And these people may not have the time to go through the normal security processes”

“Is that legal?”

“Sometimes. Actually, it’s usually unprotected data that doesn’t need security because you need so much other knowledge to understand it anyway. And often it belongs to the guys who are asking for it. It’s just they don’t have the programming skill to extract it in a sensible format, and they don’t have the time to analyse it manually”

He could see she was thinking about it

“Does it work?”

“Of course it works. This is the way the computer finds its way around. This is what the user progs reference from a higher level. This is just looking at the problem from the computers perspective, rather than the user program perspective, Do you want me to write it for you?”

“Hey Thanks, But I think I need to understand it, so if it needs changing I can amend it”

“Depends if you’re staying. It’s dead easy to write a time bomb into code like this”
“No, I draw the line there”
“Sorry” and then after a pause “There’s nothing wrong with doing this. It’s what systems software guys use all the time. It’s what sys-progs look at to solve low level crashes. It’s using the power of the computer as it was intended, without being strangled by rules and regulations”

“But can anyone just access this stuff. It sounds a bit dangerous. Like, if you forgot to put an offset in you could screw things up wholesale”

“This is true. Its very easy to crash the entire system, or corrupt someone else’s program that’s running. And you certainly can’t do this in Cobol. You need to write this code in assembler. Ok it can be done in PL/1 but its so much easier in assembler”

“I do write assembler. My core routine is in assembler for speed. Its used repeatedly even for just one transaction”

“Ok. So what you doing this afternoon. D’you want to write a program?”

“But you’re not sure of the exact hex?”

“True but…”

A phone call later, Tristan had a list of the values.

“It’s a bit public, isn’t it” she said nervously as they sat down at a sheltered table. An overweight waitress in black trousers placed a large coffee pot on the table

“The chances of anyone passing by who actually understands this is minimal. And if they do, they’ll be only too interested in joining in”

By late afternoon, Tristan was happy with the code. He ran through what it would do once again so that Vicki could confirm that that is what she was trying to do. There were a number of variables that they couldn’t resolve, like the offset of the index key, because Vicki couldn’t remember them from memory, but slotting them in would take seconds rather than hours.

“I think this calls for a small celebration” he said “Let’s go for a drink, then it’ll be time for you to go to work. Hopefully it will be incident free tonight”

But that’s as far as the plan went.

Vicki had changed back into her black trousers for her bar work, but the manager met her with a sheepish smile as she entered the bar

“Ah Vicki. Listen, I think it would be better if you weren’t working here. It’s too big a risk, That big guy coming back and injuring someone”

“They already have” she exclaimed “I had a big chunk of glass embedded in my arm yesterday. So you’re giving me the sack are you? What for? It wasn’t my fault. It’s me that got injured!”

“Yeah, but we haven’t got enough customers to pay your wages anyway”

“So, I’ve come all the way over here for nothing? You should at least pay for my time to show up in good faith”

“Yeah, well I’m not doin’ that either”

The silent standoff lasted all of five long seconds. Vicki turned without a farther word and Tristan followed her out.

“What a damned cheek!. It's not as if it was me lobbing bottles around the bar!”

“I agree. It's a bit rough. But if he does come back tonight, your manager fella will be in his own. Can't see the crib players or the bikers jumping in to rescue him. And in any case, you didn't really want that job”

“No, I just feel…offended”

“Agree. But it also means we get to have dinner together”

She broke into a smile.

“That's true. I was wondering where dinner fitted into your schedule for me”

“Hey!” he defended “it was only meant to be a suggestion”

“I need to go back to my flat and get changed. Will you act as escort? You’ll need to excuse me while I discard the old me and change into the new Vicki, just for you!

“Of course, but I need to go back to my place as well.”

Vicki agreed to take the chance and walk back into town on her own. Otherwise, as Tristan had pointed out, it would be getting too late for the regular restaurants and they'd land up with another curry.

There was, he mused, a real chance that she wouldn't show up, and that he'd never see her again. But that only took him back to thinking about Cassandra and Jasmine all over again. But the concern was for nothing and even though he was early, she was waiting outside the bistro.

“I was thinking you might not show up” she said on arrival

“That was my line” he returned, and they laughed together to get the evening off to a better start than last night.

There was so much he wanted to know about her, and the conversations led around. It settled on her question of “why are you here anyway”

“Sounds philosophical”

“No, just, why did you decide to come on holiday?”

“It's a bit like you. I'm trying to sort myself out”

“Can I help? I could listen?”

“Would you? Really? Ok I think I've got two problems. One is the work I do, and the other is the company I keep. Which is pretty much my whole life. I do a lot of work in the city. One of my clients is a guy named Julian. He has an IQ of at least a million and he uses it to figure out stocks and shares. He's the guy I went to Africa with”

“And he goes on a lot of these life threatening trips?”

“Yes”

“Why? I mean what does he do?”

“He collects information. He figures out how things are going”

“Like he's a spy?”

“Not really. I mean he’s not government sponsored. He works entirely off his own back. He collects info first hand in things like diamond mines, and then figures out if it's worth investing in. Then he uses that information. Sometimes he asks me for a specialist analysis program, sometimes its on his own data, but not always, and mostly he does stuff for himself. But he puts guys in touch with me, in return I give him a fast turnaround if he needs something.

Then there's Jasmine. Jasmine is fall down beautiful. She's super model beautiful. Guys have been known to crash cars into lampposts when she's on the sidewalk”

“And you fancy her, right? But she’s out of your league”

“No, quite the opposite. She used to share a flat with Julian, you know the African traveller. But it was just ‘share the flat’. Nothing else happened, because all she wanted was a guy to hide behind while she worked on finding a billionaire somewhere. But she put about that she shared this flat with him, to put all the other guys off so they weren't hitting on her all the time. It hardly mattered to him because he was out and about so much in Africa, and Europe. Anyway, he gave it the elbow and moved to the South West, and now she wants me to replace him. But I don't want to move in there because it would be impossible to go out with anyone else”

“Style well and truly cramped!”

“Absolutely. But also none of the girls want to upset her because she makes it her business to know so many very rich single guys that they might get introduced to. So I can't turn it down without everyone else thinking I'm nuts because they don’t understand the setup she’s looking for, and she'd go potty anyway, and being drop dead G she's pretty powerful in the circle I work in. She just looks doleful with those huge brown eyes and whatever she wants just happens”

“Like a cuddly puppy dog?”

“Yes, but puppies are not generally selectively cuddly”

“That's a tough one. How did you ever get into that?”

“Ah, that's where Cassandra comes in”

“Oh my goodness” she laughed “did you never learn that when you realise you're in a big hole, stop digging!”

“Yeah, for sure. But first you have to realise how big the hole is, and sometimes that’s not easy when you’re down a big hole”

“So where does this Cassandra fit in?”

“Well, about a year ago, no maybe more than that, but round about then I was chasing her”

“Was she really pretty too? “

“Yes, but she went around with Jasmine so no one really noticed her. But I thought I might have a chance there. Anyway, I got nowhere. Not until I did some work for Al. Alessandro Florantini that is. If the name sounds familiar it's probably because he often writes the financial leader in the Telegraph. Anyway, I did this piece of work for him. He wanted it right then at six o'clock. I was just leaving my office, so the best I could offer was the next morning. He asked if there was any chance I could do it before the markets opened, so I stayed up all night to get it done and was at his office at five the next day. Then about three days later, which was settlement day at the end of the month, he called me out the blue and asked for my bank details. Transferring money directly between accounts is quite common in our business because it keeps it low profile. Often it's off balance sheet because it's transferred before the net of a deal is worked out. Al said that what I'd done for him worked perfectly and even though it wasn’t part of the deal, he'd cut me in for 10%. So suddenly I had a bit extra to spend in the bistros and wine bars, and suddenly Cassie was interested. But that told me she was just a gold digger, so I backed off that. However, when she heard I might be moving in with Jaz she's suddenly back on the scene saying she's been going out with me all along, just she and me have both been away quite a bit. So if I don't stuff myself by moving in with Jaz, I'll stuff myself by being back with Cassie.

“Or you tell them both to poke it”

“In which case they both moan wholesale to my clients what a rag I am, and I lose all my business”

He paused, looking to her for an instant solution, but instant the solution was not, and they moved onto the subject of Vicki's program problem.

“I've been thinking about it, and what you said about working on an alternative plan which sometimes negates everything anyone else has done in the meantime. I mean, I don't know what's happened since I walked out. So…so..so what I want to do is to go through it again with you, and then go back to Birmingham and install it. If it works, then I don't need to ask Darren for help, but it still doesn't solve him hitting on me. It just solves that guilt thing I've got about leaving the rest of the guys up the creek”

“Well, that's a start. Taking the different issues one at a time. Like, you could organise leaving in a more rational way, maybe find a new job to go to. And it would mean you had more time to fend him off rather than feel under pressure all the time.”

Dinner was over, it was getting late, and the staff at the bistro were clearing down the serving areas. It was time to go, to find a late night bar or maybe a walk along the beach, or just go home.

“Maybe” Tristan asked hesitantly “you'd like to stay at my place again tonight”

“Maybe”

“Well, if not, then maybe we could look at your program in the morning over breakfast?”

Tristan was perplexed again by the pause. Was he digging another hole for himself?

Maybe he was jumping the gun, or was there something fundamental he’d missed. He wasn’t wanting her in payment for writing her program. Is that what she thought? Was he wrong to think she was interested in sharing joy and fun and pleasure? But she had to want to as well as him

“Except I thought you wanted more than that” he said quietly with some obvious disappointment due to the thoughts that had gone unsaid

“I’m beginning to get that”

“Oh my! Have I dug another massive hole for myself and not noticed. Maybe this is just a example of attracting naked grief by saying too much at the wrong time. Like you'd take that to mean that it was something I was expecting you to do for me because I'm helping you. But all I would have meant I that here's an additional plus point.”

She leaned over and kissed him very briefly as she took his hand and walked back along the beach to the east steps. Again Vicki looked out of his window impressed by the view of the promenade curving around the bay with the lights just coming on as the daylight faded.

Love was gentle that night. Relaxed and slow, and then with a long intimate build up to the second round the next morning. She leaned back on her pillow in the most relaxed state she’d known for months. This programming method he used looked like it would work. It all made perfect sense, although she was completely unfamiliar with it. This opened up all sorts of possibilities.

They went for breakfast via the bus station only to find that getting back to Brum was going to be rather hit and miss. There were four changes to do all on quite tight schedules.

“That'll take all day” she moaned “and then I'll have to stay overnight, and I don't know if Pete’s away.

“Who's Pete?”

“Pete is my soon to be ex, sometimes boyfriend”

“Sounds fairly definitive and equally terminal”

“Yes. That's a given. His sole contribution to my problem with Darren is to tell me I was quite pretty really and so I have to expect that sort of thing. That .. .. Is the kind of guy I don't need. But I need to get back and get this done as soon as I can”

So you really want to get there today. Sounds tough. It's going to take a couple of hours just to check the code. Then when you get there you’ve got to link it to the rest of your system and I don’t think we’ve set up the interface variables yet. Then you have to get this coded up, compiled, link tested. JCL written. It's going to take overnight. At least.”

“Overnight may be the answer. If I phone Dominic, he's the big boss, and get clearance for overnight working, I could get there by this evening, work all night and get it finished during tomorrow, that way I avoid Pete, even if he is in town”

“You’re going to have to catch up with him sometime aren't you?

“I guess. But not at the same time as I'm trying to get this working. Like you said, lets take the problems one at a time”

“So first we check the code. Then its check out the transport then its phone this Dom guy”

“But Tris, I’ve been thinking about what you said about being in control. .. .. and packaging. Sooo what should I be wearing for the office?”

Tristan smiled “Ok. That skirt is too short for the office, especially if there’s any crawling around on the floor looking for recalcitrant network plugs or if you’re working at a table rather than a desk. You need something just above the knee, but flared or pleated, not pencil. You don’t want to look like a secretary”

“Back to the high street then”

Code checked and dress bought they grabbed a sandwich for lunch and collapsed onto the beach to eat it.

She lay back on the warm sand and leant her head against his. She’d come here to escape the reality she’d created for herself, and now she felt like there was a new Vicki, clearer about the future, and then again completely unclear about the major elements. Not sure about her job, definitely dump boyfriend, maybe move out of Brum altogether.

“I’m not sure I’m any farther forward than when I came here. I’ve got a probable solution to my program, but now its everything else that’s equally unclear. I want to get myself sorted out!”

“I think” he replied “that the root cause is not having a clear view of what you want and then being mean enough to everyone else to go and get it. But, Vicki, ‘want’ is a very dangerous word. Like if I thought I wanted to get completed bladdered, but conversely what I want even more is not to have a head like the operational site for a steam hammer and a stomach that’s attempting to turn my entire body inside out. Trouble is every want has its consequences, and they are often the downside. If you don’t want the downside, you don’t really want the thing in the first place”

“And for your next contribution to encouragement?”

“Sorry. Just the programmer in me, one line of code leads to the next”

“But life isn’t a program!”
“No? Hmm. No, it’s not, but it’s quite similar in many respects. Until you read the next record, you won’t know what route you’ll take through the code. And you’re next bus is in ten minutes. Have you got your case ready?”

“Never mind that, What day is it “
“Thursday”

“Jeez. I think I lost track. I’ve only got my room till tomorrow. I’ll have to check out”

Vicki’s case was no bigger that a flight bag, and the call with Dominic seemed to go astray even though Tristan could only hear one end of it.

“Hi Dominic. It’s Vicki, Vicki Smallwood… Yes, I’m fine, you? …No I just needed some peace and quiet to solve the data access problem… Barbara? The only Barbara I know is in Finance Admin… At the program board? …Oh, taking the minutes... Did she now! I had no idea she knew, or noticed or… Well thankyou for that… Yes, I think I‘ve got a solution, but it needs testing. I was hoping you’d agree to me working overnight because I’ve already missed a few days... Yes, tonight. The system will be quieter with only batch running. And there’ll be fewer interruptions. Thankyou… Yes. I agree with that. Me too. Procedures are ok, but they’re not always appropriate or expedient are they. Yes, see you tomorrow probably… Definitely! Ok if you say so,. Bye”

She turned back to Tristan.

“The girl taking the minutes at the Board announced that the reason I wasn’t there was because I was fed up with Darren pestering me, and she wasn’t surprised I’d walked out. She would have done the same. So Dominic asked Darren for an explanation, and apparently, all hell broke loose”

“Return to the battlefield. But this bus isn’t good news. “

“Why”

“It’s cancelled. Road’s closed due to an accident”

“But I’ve just arranged to be there”

“Well we need a plan B. What about a fast train from Bridgewater”

“Bridgewater’s the wrong way!”

“Yes, but it’s on the main line from Penzance”

“Still have to get there”

“Cab? Cost a fortune though. Ok I’ve got two other ideas. No, three”

“You’re always full of ideas aren’t you!”

“Not always, but look. I’ll drive you to Taunton, or you can borrow my car, or even, I’ll drive you to Birmingham”

“I didn’t know you had a car”

“That’s how I got here. Just drove up on Sunday”

“Where is it, what is it?”

“It’s just up the side of where my room is. You must have seen it”
“Is that why you take a good peek up that side street when we go back there?”

“Yes”

“I thought maybe you were checking that no one was watching us, like maybe you were ashamed of me”
“Vicki! No way!”

“I guess I could rent a car, but. I’d rather go on the train if there is one”

“Ok. Bridgewater here we come”

“Which is your car?”

“That one there, it’s the dark blue one.”

“What on earth is that!”

“It’s a Lotus..”

“I never thought you’d have something way out there like this. You didn’t buy it new did you?”
“No, but its only about a year old. In the business I work in, there’s always someone makes a mistake and has to sell a yacht or Porsche or something in a real hurry. There’s always a good deal somewhere when it comes close to settlement day at the end of each month”

Vicki found the ride exhilarating. She lay back in the white leather and wondered what it would take for things to get any better. Solution to her problem, decision on Pete, luxury sports car, and Tristan. She looked over towards him as he concentrated on the traffic.

“You ok” he asked as he noticed her watching him

“Mmmmm”

They headed for the ticket office

“You’ll be there by the time most folks are going home”

“Sounds about right. I think that’s the way I want it. Single to New Street please”

“So” he turned her round “Is this Auf wiedersehen, So Long, Au Revoire or just simply, Goodbye?”

Cue Odysseus by tRK Project

Vicki’s face turned blank as the blood drained from her and she grabbed his arm still holding her case in her other hand.

“I. I hadn't thought of it that way. I've been too bound up in .. “

“Yeah. Too busy solving yesterday's problems to think about tomorrow”

She spun round and took the three steps back to the ticket kiosk

“Can I get a refund on this and get a return instead?”

“Sorry, miss. It's too close to the travel time on the ticket to do that”

She spun back to Tristan as her train was announced

“I don't want to say goodbye…” Then scanning the arrivals board “There's a train gets in here from Brum about 7 tomorrow evening. I'll try to be on it”

She dived through the gate as the guard shouted the last call, and was gone.

First CCI run

Alone now on the train, her head clouded over. She missed Tristan already, but was much clearer about where she was going. Unless, of course, all the other people in the world had different ideas and got in the way. But she should just ignore them. If it didn't fit in with her plan, she should just drive a coach and horses through it. If she dared. What if people didn't like it? What if they thought she was wrong or just plain bad? But Tristan was right, maybe she wouldn't worry too much about what other people thought of her if she remembered how little they thought about her at all. And in the office. Well! The cat was well and truly out of the bag regarding Darren. And Dominic was furious. It had put the whole program at risk, and it was his neck that was on the block.

Dominic was waiting for her as she sat down at her desk.

“Good to see you back” he opened cheerily” and looking more than lovely”

“Thanks”

“Now, do you have everything you need?”

“I think so. Desk, terminal. Ideas. That's about it”

“Access to the commuter room?”

“Yes thankyou. I've always had that”

“Oh, it's just most people don’t”

“But I'm not most people” she joked, then realised that this could be the shape of the new Vicki, the one she wanted to be, not the one at everyone else’s beck and call.

Everything buzzing round her head were things Tristan had said. Don't forget to annotate. Use comments on every single line, you'll need them when you forget how it’s supposed to work when you get interrupted. It's not what other people say or do, it's how you react that matters. Stay in control. Don't rise to the bait….

She keyed in her code and it was time for coffee. She corrected the syntax errors, more coffee. Link, run and start tests. Create more data, drink more coffee. So far, so good, but it was half past four in the morning. Time to go up to ops and thank them for their cooperation, always a good hedge.

Shift leader was Adam. He'd been there since the bank got their very first computer, and knew virtually everything about it. He was well respected by people who knew him, but as a specialist, his fame had not spread very far outside the computer room, especially amongst the new comers following the merger.

“Hello, Vicki. Nice to see you back again. A few problems, I hear, but mainly solved now?”

Adam was about 55. He'd worked in a number of departments in the bank, and had been there since he was 16. Always calm, never flustered, and almost always discreet.

“Some are, some have still got a way to go” she replied not knowing if he was talking about her program or her personal life.

“Everything running smoothly?” she asked

He nodded, no major issues so far. Printer 3 is out, so some stuff will be late, but the batches are light, which should help us catch up”

He nudged her arm as an indication to walk with him. He led her through the balcony airlock. “this is a great place to watch the sunrise” be said, pointing her in the direction of the increasing red glow “ it's one of the best things about night shift”

“It's nice, but I'd rather see it from a Greek beach, or maybe a cruise ship”

“Yeah, me too. Look Vicki…” he looked around to make sure that the rest of the shift wasn't interested in the sunrise as well. “…Mal was talking at me yesterday. He was saying that there's no way you'll be able to access enough data to make your system work. He tells me that from his security point of view, you'll spend your entire life gaining clearance, resetting passwords and correcting failures where permissions have timed out. I don't want to sound negative, but the point he was really making was that he has every intention of making sure it doesn't work. I think he may have some bad blood with Dom”

Vicki sighed, that was about all she needed

“Thanks Adam. That wouldn't surprise me. Dom's made no real secret of the fact he thinks Mal's security is getting in the way of doing business. Its all been bubbling up since the takeover”

“It’ll mean trouble if he's now out for a showdown”

“Well, we'll see. My test should start running about now. Let's hope it stays running”

“Let's hope you don't break my machine. There must be a reason you're running this at night. I just hope it's not too hairy”

“Adam, it's mainly to avoid Darren. I don't want to have to put up with him as well”

“Nice cover for the technical dangers. Its putting quite a stress on the I-O channels with so much data”

“I don’t think I’m part of the conspiracy, at least in theory. I’ve tried to minimise it where I can” she replied. “And thanks for your help and the heads up”

Adam, if anyone, would guess what she was up to. But then again, he's unlikely to tell anyone.

Back at her desk, the summary report was on screen. She raced back into ops to collect the printout directly from the computer room. A few typos on the report headings and fixed text, but the variable stuff! That looked like it was working, in test anyway.

But bearing in mind what Adam had said, maybe she should just go for it and run against the live files. That would prove it worked, and if it stopped working it would be because someone had done something. Someone like Mal who was in an unassailable position as saboteur.

She updated the JCL. Submit. And ran back upstairs to tell Adam. Just in case.

“There's a very thin line between brave and foolhardy, and I'm not sure which side you're on” he questioned

“I guess that depends on whether it works or not. I've submitted it held, so you have the option of not running it, if you really really don't want to”

“Is it going to crash my machine?”

“I hope not”

“Hope, young Victoria, is seldom enough”

He tapped into the screen

“Access denied, it says here, retry?” Vicki heart rate rocketed “access to what? Which database?”

“Ah, you’re trying to use a production JCL routine from your test library and you haven't issued a specific override command” she peered around the side of his shoulder, willing her heart rate to slow down before she exploded.

“Sometimes I think it would be a good idea if I knew how to operate this beast”

“Quite frankly, Vicki, I think you know far too much about it already. Look, there it goes. I've given it access to that library. Probably better if you just copy these statements and run them inline. Save any future issues”

“If only it was that easy to avoid future issues”.

The early birds were arriving for work now, and Vicki retired to a break out area to find an armchair to sleep in. She rested, part dosing unmolested for a couple of hours, while back at her desk an entire box of printout had arrived.

She'd only looked at the first three reports before interruption number one. Why was it that no matter how long she'd not been working on a system she was still the expert. But, strangely, Darren was nowhere to be seen.

But this was epic. This code from Tristan was amazing. This new technique! She heaved the box up towards Dominic's office and quizzical interest from his PA. It's the first live report from .. “

“Live?”

“Kind of. It's all live data, but the system isn't in the production libraries yet, cos it's not signed off”

“Are you allowed to use live data”

“No”

“So what do you want me to tell Dom when he gets back?”

“Tel him it's the first live run. And then duck”

“No way! I'll tell him to call you”

“Oh, Clare, you'll miss out on the fun!”

“Only too pleased to, with the fireworks going off round here the last few days. Glad it's Friday”

Dom sat with his hand across his mouth as if to stifle saying something rude

“So, this is all live data” he accused

“Yes, Dom. It's the only way to prove that it works. And that if it stops working, then it's something someone else has done to it”

Dominic looked at her suspiciously

“Are you implying that that is a probability?”

“Well, it's got to be. The system has always been controversial” Dom remained silent “with certain parties.” she continued. Still no comment “so the higher the profile, the lower the risk of it, well, being tampered with, as it were”

Dom still said nothing, but picked up the phone

“It's Dom, is Eric there? … Eric, I've got the first output from our account analysis system. Thought you might be interested. Having had a quick glance, I think there's a number of business issues it highlights that we may not have considered before. Yes, I've got the programmer with me right now. She'll be able to explain it better than me”

Eric was Business Services director. No one ever got to be a director by being all good, and Eric was the proof. He was about 63 years old, with grey hair and was just shorter than her. He was scary with a ruthless reputation, poker faced and drilled holes in your brain with his faded blue eyes focussed through thick lensed half rims. He poured through the printout with Dom asking the odd question, mainly what the source was for data fields, while Vicki became acutely aware that she had missed dinner, breakfast, and now lunch, and was running on adrenalin and caffeine. She was also becoming aware of the magnitude of the value of these reports, and equally, why the system was controversial.

He looked up from the desk which was now covered in a tangle of continuous paper. He fixed her with a stare.

“This is live data, yes? Who authorised it?”

Vicki's mouth went dry, as she paused momentarily

“I did” she replied

Dom gave a small shiver as Eric spoke again

“Did you now! Do you have the seniority to authorise this?”

“I was the most senior member of the programming department in the building at the time”

Eric narrowed his eyes to consider the audacity of the reply

“Do you know what the data population of these is?”

“I’m sorry, data population?”
“Yes, data completeness. Are these values available from every account on the customer file, or are there lots of blanks”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know, I’ve just added up every one it could find”

Eric narrowed his eyes without comment.

“So the situation could be worse, but not better. But we don’t know by how much”

“Oh, wait! Sorry. The last page of the report should give us the technical info” she turned the bulk of the printout over to find the end.

“Yes, look here. This is the number of records, I mean accounts, and this is the number that have contributed to the totals. So there’s 1,860 not contributing. They may contain the value zero, but these 1800 have a blank or something else that isn’t a number”

“Hmm, errors, false entries, but less than half a percent. So this is the full scale of the problem”

He turned to Vicki

“Have you had lunch? No? Good. Come with me”

She'd never been in the directors dining suite before. The lunch menu was short but looked amazing, and there was a wine list as well. She drew in a deep breath determined not to be overwhelmed. He may be an ogre to everyone but she had a choice. She always had a choice, and he was probably a man underneath that monster exterior persona who could be talked to on a regular basis. And not just that, she had been invited to lunch.

“I’m considering that you must have had a very good reason to use the live database. It has after all, all our customers’ private details on it?”

“Yes, I am familiar with it. That’s what we’re meant to be reporting on with this system”

“Quite, but only after its signed off and live. So there must be more to it than that?”

“Having worked on it for 4 months now, I knew it was going to reveal a lot more than Audrey’s group had anticipated. So I decided that after the tests, I’d run it against live to show exactly what it was capable of..”

She paused, but she sensed that he was waiting for more. “I also know that the whole system has caused significant controversy in having access to a number of other system at the same time. There are instances of certain people trying to derail the development. So I wanted to produce a printout that showed it worked. Then if it stopped working, I could show that someone else had interfered with it, not that I couldn’t get it to work in the first place”

Eric was nodding “How sure are you that the numbers are accurate?”

“Very confident. Its adds up as it goes along, and there are cross checks on the totals so it adds up across and down if you get the analogy”

“And do you understand what the impact of this is going to be?”
“No, I don’t think I do. Some of the numbers are bigger than I can really comprehend. I mean , what does 150 million pounds actually look like. Does it fit in a van, or do you need a truck”

Eric almost smiled “Actually Vicki, you would need a fairly large fleet of trucks, especially if it was all in 20s rather than gold bullion. But if your numbers are accurate, then we have that number in dubious offshore funds transfers which is a good indicator of money laundering. If we’re guilty of that, then the fine could easily be 40% of that”

“60 million!”

“Yes, which in perspective, is my entire departmental budget for an entire decade. However, we might be able to halve that if we can prove we’ve discovered it and are working on the case. So the probable value of your report last night is 30 million pounds. Apart from all the other stuff that Audrey’s team might find”

Vicki gasped “Wow, Pity I’m not on 10%”

“You and me both, Vicki. But there must be not a single word of this to anyone. The numbers involved tell you why. And that’s why I invited you to lunch. Anything overheard in this room, will stay confidential even if the other directors overhear. And that’s not the same anywhere else. So, apart from this, how do you think we should use this system?”

“Well, Audrey’s team has been doing this sort of investigation for years. This system speeds up the process. But it also assesses the data in ways that Audrey’s people can’t do, taking up to eleven factors into account at the same time so I think we could use it to point Audrey’s team at accounts to investigate farther to produce case reports. The system won’t write crown court reports on its own”

Eric considered this while chewing his roast lamb

“And” continued Vicki “Doing that gives you a great smoke screen to hide this other, high value stuff behind. To help keep it low profile”

Eric tilted his head slightly, still piercing her head with his continuous stare.

“Good point. Very, very good point. But you were about to tell me who’s been getting in the way?”

“No, I wasn’t intending to raise that. It was just a fear that….”

“That Darren would sabotage it” interrupted Eric

“Darren?”

“Yes. Isn’t that why he was interrupting you every 5 minutes?”

Vicki was speechless for a moment. So he didn’t really want to go out with her. He just wanted to spook her work

“But I thought it was just Mal on his security high horse?”

“Mal’s point I understand. I don’t agree with it, but I can understand it. I don’t know what Darren’s motivation was”

“Sorry, Mr Carter, but I just thought he was desperate to go out with me”

“Now…” Eric said shaking his fork “…That I could understand. And, incidentally, I could easily agree with, although I can’t condone the tactics. But I still think he has some angle on this”

They headed back towards the office “I’m not always easy to get hold of, but you make sure you let Dominic or myself know if you run into any, how shall we say, trouble. Are you doing anything special this weekend?”
“I’m going to Somerset. Might have a bit of a rest”

“You enjoy yourself. And I will catch up with you on Monday. Oh hello, Adam. Are you well?”

“Hello Mr Carter, Yes, very well thankyou. Oh Vicki, Mal was quizzing me on how your tests ran. I told him that the big test failed on an ‘access denied’ error. He seemed pleased with that”

“Thanks Adam. You’re a star”

“I thought it all worked perfectly” Eric asked as they reached his office

“It did, but only at the second attempt. The first time it was trying to access the production control library, and it can’t do that till it’s signed off and transferred to live production. Easy enough to get round, though. Thanks for lunch, Mr Carter”

Back at her desk, she shut down her terminal, and put her coat on

“Aren’t you going to update me on progress? I hear the test failed on an access error” smirked Darren

“No, and no in that order”

“No?”

“No, because you’ve done nothing but get in the friggin’ way since you took over this team. I may, or may not be in on Monday”

“Now, you just wait a minute..”

“No! Goodnight Darren”

She turned quickly flicking her hemline just to wind him up, and was pleased with the new, definitive, decisive Vicki”

Weekend in Cove

She bought her ticket for Bridgwater and headed for the train, only to find it was delayed by half an hour and sat down and waited, watching the departures screen. There was a platform number, and there was a train at that platform. She sank onto a seat in the nearest carriage. Next task, not fall asleep and miss Bridgewater.

“Sorry, doll. Trains cancelled. It’s going nowhere, the engines broke”

“Oh What? Oh no”

“Ticket’s valid on any other service”

Checking the timetable in the office, it looked like the best option was to get to Bristol then the local stopping train to Bridgwater.

Temple Meads came into view easily enough, but it looked like half the population of Avon was trying to get on this train. It was rammed. And there was a lot of moaning about waterlogged tracks. The ticket inspector moaned at her for having the wrong ticket, but let it go when she explained, and the rain started lashing in through a window that wouldn’t close properly. The crush thinned out after a couple of stops, but progress was slow as the train stopped on a number of occasion. She peered out into the rain to see which station they were at, and how far they’d got, but all there was, was floodwater

“Can’t be too careful through these floods”

Oh, for goodness sake. Get a wiggle on, and eventually Bridgewater station. She checked her watch. Just gone 8.30 as she hauled herself onto the windswept platform, peering through the lashing rain. As expected, no sign of Tristan, or anyone else after the rush for the exit had subsided. That just about sums it up, she said to herself as she drifted out towards the car park. But what was that? It was black, or maybe not, she walked over to it and wiped some of the rain from the door. Maybe it was dark blue. But it might not be Tristan’s. They’re not exactly common, so it might be! And its parked right next to the gate so I’d notice it!! Maybe? She looked around and realised she was directly facing the Commercial Inn. Logically, if he was around, he’d be in the bar. She made it to reception “Do you have a room for tonight”

She checked in and migrated to the bar, largely ignoring the two uniformed officers sitting at a table in the foyer. Tristan was just sorting out payment for the beer that had just been pulled when he caught sight of her

“That’ll be 89 pence sir, please”

Tristan put the pound note on the bar, as he started towards her, bumping into the guy next to him, who wasn’t pleased “Oi, What you think….”

“Do me a favour, pal, drink that for me. Its clear fresh”

“11p change” said the barman

“You keep it, said the guy who now had a new beer “He won’t be back”

She caught sight of him pushing his way through the crowd. She dropped her case and stopped dead to wait for him. Her face broke into a broader and broader smile, as the excitement spread. He is here1 He was waiting for me! All this time. I’m an hour and a half late and he’s still here waiting for me. Oh my! Tears formed in her eyes as he caught hold of her, lifting her clear off the floor. He slipped his arms around her and held her as tightly as he could while still being able to walk as they made it to the hallway.

“I’ve checked a room” she said as they turned towards the stairs “I thought that would be better than another hour’s drive”

“Excuse me miss. I’m sorry but you can’t do that”

“Can’t do what”

“Can’t do what you’re about to do”

“I’m not with you” quizzed Tristan

“Well, you two may be legit. And I can’t prove nothin’. But we have a lot of trouble here with young ladies coming in here, checking a room, heading to the bar and then disappearing upstairs with a guy. And it’s that sort of thing that these two officers are here to take a view on”

One of the policemen raised an eyebrow. “And I wouldn’t be driving if you’ve been drinking sir” he added unhelpfully

“I agree with that, but that’s why we’re checked in”

The hotel manager was shaking his head

“Can’t take the risk, I’m ‘fraid. Lose me licence, see”

“Come on Vicki, We’ll just have to drive back to Cove. We’ll be fine. I’ve only had one”

Back out in the rain they made it across the road as Vicki slowed the pace to a stop. She turned to face him “I can’t believe you’re still here. I was so afraid you wouldn’t be here”

“Not as afraid as I was that you might not come back”

The copper had got up to see if he showed signs of excess alcohol

“What’s he done? Gone back in the bar and just dumped her?”

“No, Jack, that ain’t no ordinary hooker. Look at the pair, honestly”

“What’s that?”

“They’re just standing in the pouring rain, kissing”

“Oi. You two. Miss Smallwood. Come back in out of the rain”

Tristan guided her back and they stood dripping onto the carpet in the hall

“Ah’s sorry. You’re obviously not the kind of girl we’re worried about. Breakfast’s 7.30 till 9” as he handed back her key

Upstairs they dried off a little, she curled herself around him in bed, and fell straight to sleep.

Tristan lay awake, just holding her gently. She’d come back. That was half the options binned. And she’d been as desperate to see him as he was with her. And he’d never felt like this about anyone since he’d first set eyes on Joanne when he was 15. Although, he now remembered, that only lasted 3 months. Yes, he argued as his mind continued to remember the events like a video recorder stuck on play, but Joanne had o/d-ed on some dodgy hash, and the funeral was the saddest thing he’d ever been to, ever, and hopefully for ever. Enough. Surely he knew Vicki well enough now to know that wasn’t going to happen. But he worked in the City and she was in Brum. Long distance relationships work for a while, but then you have to shorten the distance or it will fall apart. It’s only natural to want company throughout the week as well as weekends. Come on, Tris, get your head together. All problems have a solution. The first question is just which problem do you want to solve. But solutions were forming. He’d already decided to turn down the next African trip. Julian could go and kill himself, but by himself. He didn’t need Tristan’s help to do that. And he’d decided to go and see Al and make sure he didn’t think he was bonkers and maybe explain Jasmine’s deal. And Cassie? She was just a fair-weather gold digger. Telling her she could sling her hook would be fairly easy, so long as he did it with a smile and she didn’t get too wound up. And that left Vicki and his career direction. But he was good at his job, and he liked it and maybe there would still be enough assignments even if Jasmine put the boot in for him. Or he could maybe just go back to PWC. Ah but that would mean being away all week, which would be ok if him and Vicki didn’t work out. And Vicki? Maybe he should just get a large solitaire and see what she says! What! After four days? Now Al would definitely think he was bonkers.

Breakfast was a leisurely affair. No one seemed to mind how long they stayed at their table, while the day staff busied themselves with clearing things around them, and setting lunch tables.

“We didn't get much chance to talk yesterday”

“ I know, I’m sorry. I fell asleep”

“I noticed, but that's what I was expecting. Missing one whole night’s sleep is about as much as you should attempt. But we've got all day today, and all night, and all day tomorrow”

“But we don't have to do anything. Just walk along the shore, park ourselves at a beachside cafe and watch the world go by.”

“Yes. Sometimes it's interesting to be a spectator on life, watch other people, maybe even behave like them”
“I don’t think I want to behave like these beach urchins desperately seeking skin cancer. But I think its interesting to watch them sometimes, and maybe speculate of their motivation”

“Maybe its because everyone else is doing it – following like sheep?”

“One by one the sheep are stealing my sanity. Its strange. Everyone seems to want to find a role model these days. Someone to follow like a false prophet. What for? I want to make my own mind up. I don't need to follow anyone”

“Me too. I want to be a participant. I don't just want to live as someone else’s shadow”

“I agree. I mean, I don't have any heroes. Ok some guys earn more money, and some guys have a magnetic attraction for women. But I'm ok being me. I'll just think it through, come to my conclusion, and get on and do the best I can”

They walked on with Vicki still in disbelief at the situation

“Oh, Tristan. I’m so sorry about being so late yesterday, I was an hour and a half late. I'd already steeled myself for you not being there. That you'd given up on me. I still can't really believe you waited for me”

“You said you'd be there. Ok, you actually said you'd try to be there, but I wanted to believe that you said you'd be there”

“How long would you have waited”

“Just as long as I could convince myself there was still a chance you'd show up.”

“And if I hadn't turned up?”

“I'd have waited till Monday and called your office, just to make sure you were ok, and that you'd decided that a holiday romance should end with the holiday”

“Holiday romance! Is that what we've got?”

“It would be if you hadn’t come back”

Travel disruption was everywhere. It hardly mattered in Cove because they didn’t want to go anywhere that they couldn’t walk to and preferably under cover. But come Monday it was all change and the only viable option was for her to borrow his car. She’d drive him to Bristol and he’d take the train back to London - eventually. This also solved another issue for her. With a car, she could more easily get out to where her parents lived and that’s where she’d be staying.

She hadn't been looking forward to this bit of her plan, but now it was here she was looking on the positive side. It was a major part of her moving forward and that was good.

She heard the key in the lock - would it be good, bad or just plain ugly?

“We'll, well, well. And where might I ask have you been? Disappeared off the face of the earth for a week or more without a bye-your-leave from anyone”

He stopped in the doorway waiting for an answer.

“Whatever. Look Pete. I just dropped in to say goodbye”

“What! why?”

“We're through, Pete. When I needed you most, when Darren was hitting on me all the time so much that I couldn’t do my job, when I just wanted to give up on life, I needed help. I needed support. But you just dismissed it as trivial. And that's shows you don't really care about me. So, it's goodbye. I'm not falling out with you, I'm just moving on”

“But I've got two tickets for War Lords Return at the Cameo for next Saturday”

“I'm sure you'll find someone else to go with. I'll collect my stuff together tomorrow, and Wednesday, and get a car or van or something on Thursday”

“So what about tonight?”

“I'm in the Royal Crescent hotel. Hopefully get somewhere sorted in the next week”

“Vik, you can't be serious. We can make it work, if we try”

“WE did try, Pete. You failed. I don't want to try again. You shattered my confidence in me as well as my confidence in you, and now we're finished. If you're around I'll see you, if not I'll drop my key through the letter box. So long, Pete”

Vicki’s Event

It was Tuesday lunchtime, and a stunned silence drifted around the programming office.

“Its becoming impossible” moaned Marcia

“More restrictions” wailed Richie “What is that guy on?”

“Whatever it is, I don’t want any of it”

But Vicki wasn’t moaning, she was plotting, and it was first thing Wednesday when all hell broke loose.

But first she had to face her mum and dad. They’d been very concerned about her when she decided to move into Pete’s flat. They liked Pete. He seemed like a good lad, hardworking with the potential to hold down a decent job. But her dad had been great when she’d phoned him earlier. No, he’d said. We haven’t let your room yet. Your mum has vetoed all the applicants on length of skirt.

She squeezed her small flight bag into the car and gingerly headed out into the traffic. Visibility wasn’t good from down here and concentration was necessary. Still, it stopped her thinking about the flack she was expecting, after all, she’d got it wrong. Pete was not the one, and now she was back with mum and dad.

But they were great, and he agreed to help her shift her stuff out of the flat the following evening. Pete was away again, as usual during the week, so that should go ok. And she managed to steer the conversation over dinner to her troubles at work and the impact the takeover was having on her

“They just don’t think the same way as us. And their priorities are all skew whiff”

Yes, he had agreed, and related various tales of woe when his company had been taken over and the level of redundancies, and changes and new forms for everything. But then the phone rang and she nearly jumped out of her chair as dad answered it

“Oh, Hi Mark….”

She went back to looking at how to get round all Mal’s new security restrictions. As dad interrupted “Vicki, do you need me on Saturday for moving stuff?”

She replied not. She was hoping she might be away for the weekend, but equally realised the invitation hadn’t arrived yet.

“No, Mark. Saturday’s ok. Just checking on the progress of family disasters”.

“You’re jumpy!” he continued after Mark had gone

“Golf?” asked her mum

“Yeah, third round match. I’m paired with Mark”

But Vicki hadn’t exactly calmed down. She kept looking at the phone, willing it to ring

“You’re not hoping Pete will phone you, are you” asked mum

“No, no. He’s never phoned me mid-week before. And I don’t expect him to have changed overnight”

“Oh, I don’t know. Boys do when they realise what’s happening”

“Maybe, mum, but its too late now. He’s dumped, and I’ve moved on”

“I can’t remember you ever dumping a boy before” commented dad “it was always the other way round. And poor Jess round here to help the recovery. Whatever happened to Jess?”
“Well, things are different now. It’s time for Vicki to decide what she wants and get some of that instead. And Jess, she’s ok. She’s still working at the same place. She’s in buying, but I’ve no idea what she buys. But I’m seeing her on Thursday. We’re going to catch a bite then go for a few drinks”

“Well, the rules here are the same as they always were. No boys overnight”

“No, dad. There won’t be. We’re not going for that kind of drink.”

And she got back to willing the phone to ring

“You sure you’re not waiting for Pete to call? You haven’t sat by a phone like that since you were 17”

Vicki tried not to look at the phone, but still leapt up when it rang

“Hello” she answered it with breathless excitement “Yes. Great. No, the code worked a treat, but the issues my program has now highlighted are mind blowing. I don’t want to talk about them on the phone, but it bounced me into a whole new league. Yeah, me, then Darren, then his boss is Dom, the one I phoned, then it’s the director Eric Carter. He’s an ogre. So after we went through the print, oh, I ran it against live, Dom and Eric were unhappy I’d just done it, but then Eric took me to lunch. The Directors dining room is epic. Never been there before, and, and Dominic knows about what Darren's been up to, but doesn't know why, and Eric asked about that as well. Oh and Mal's lobbed in a whole new raft of restrictions, but I'll be able to sail a barge straight through all that with your code. The guys from Cities just work in a completely different way. Some stuff, like script updated for cashiers that will crucify the call centre, and a new cross system database that's plain impossible under Mal's new rules…. I need a what?

A designer what? What’s a Design Authority? How does that work. Oh wow that sounds a bit adventurous, but.. Oh yes. Shakespeare? Ok so where do you want me to be. Coventry is easier than Warwick. Ok.. Dad , Daddy! how long to drive to Coventry from central Brum in Friday rush hour? Hour and a half?, so. 6 o’clock is good, at the station. Sounds perfect. No I'm with dad moving stuff tomorrow, and out for a drink with Jess on Thursday. Yeah, see you Friday. Can't wait. Bye”

“Who's that, Vicki?”

“Tristan, and he says hi to you and dad”

“So that's what happened to Pete”

“No, the two are only loosely related.”

“Really?”

“Oh, mum! With everything going on at work, Pete was no support whatsoever. Just moaned on about spending so much time on the motorway, as if that wasn't affecting me as well. . .anyway, I met Tristan and he is so many things that Pete is not. Like sympathetic, and understanding and interested, and then I found out he's an ace programmer. He showed me a completely new technique that let me complete my system, which then got me lunch with my director, and he wants to meet up this weekend. He's managed to get some tickets for Stratford. Shakespeare isn't really his thing, but these tickets are like gold dust, and he says, it's good to go to something like at every so often even if it's just to remind you why you don't go to these things. And there's an outside chance it'll be good, and it's another subject to have a valid opinion on”

“Vicki, darling, slow down won’t you! But it all sounds very exciting”

“I guess you never know how long it's going to last, but we’ll see”

“But you said about driving down. I need the car to get to golf on Saturday, and then mum’s going to auntie Pats on Sunday”

“That's ok. I've got Tristan's car. There were so many cancellations on the busses and trains due to the storms he said I should borrow his car”

“So you could use that to move out of the flat tomorrow”

“Not really. There's only room for a shoe box in the boot, so everything would have to go on the front seat”

“What about the back?”

“There isn't one. It's a two seater.”

“Oh, like an MGB?”

“A bit like that. It's a Lotus Excel”

“Oh my! That’s a bit posh. Is it new?”

“Nearly, it's about a year old. It's a bit different from Pete’s Astra”

Disaster! Or not?

“Ooohh, summoned to Mr Carters office. Again!” mocked Darren “I do hope he doesn't give you the sack”

“Why, thankyou”

“Yeah, Because I want to do that myself, when the opportunity arises”

“Why don't you stick your dick in a blitzer”

“Vicki, come in, sit down. Coffee? Julie, could you sort coffee for us please. Now Vicki, the reason I asked you to pop up is because we appear to have a major issue. Or should I say another major issue. So, as I'm sure you appreciate now, confidentiality is paramount. The reason I want to talk to you is threefold. One is that you are one of the few people, if not the only person, who understands our systems well enough, and also understands what the business is trying to achieve. Two, I trust you to give me an honest opinion, even if I may not like the answer, and three, I trust your opinion.

“Thankyou, sir. I’ll do my best”

“I had a rather disturbing conversation with Malcolm Bryant this morning, and on the basis of it I've booked out the rest of the day to tackle the issue”

Vicki leant back on her chair with a minor smirk of trepidation as Eric continued

“What Malcolm told me was that yesterday evening, he had a strange phone call just as he was leaving. The voice at the other end did not identify themselves, but told him to listen and not interrupt. Then the voice gave him a number of account details including account numbers, balances, last transaction date and so on. The caller then said they could go on, but the point had been made. You wouldn't like this type of information to fall into the wrong hands, now would you. So it appears that this third party has access to our customer files but what they intend to do with it is still unclear. Malcolm is on alert in case a ransom call or such like comes in. However, you already know we're working on a major damage limitation program with this off shore funds transfer disaster that you identified, so to add a major security breach at the same time - the Regulator will crucify us”

“So what do you want me to do? Do you want me to write something?”

'No, I just want to talk it through with someone sensible, who has enough background knowledge to make useful suggestions”

“I'll try to suggest a few people”

Eric's eyes pierced her over the top of his glasses, but she was getting used to that now.

“I'm trying to decide where to start” began Eric

“I'd start with who, as possibilities” replied Vicki. “Then I'd move on to how, no, I'd move on to why, then I'd move on to how”

“Ok, lets try that. So, who could do this”

“Anyone with access to the system. So anyone on Audrey’s team”

“Yes, she's already interviewing each of them individually to see if anyone’s circumstances have changed that might make then a risk. Like maybe someone in financial trouble”

“Or blackmail” Vicki added enthusiastically

“Could be any financial difficulties. Anyone else?”

“Anyone in programming. Well, most of them anyway. They have systems access. Or anyone in the Call Centre”

“The Call Centre?”

“Yes of course. They need to look up all these details when someone phones up”

“Yes, but they need to provide security details”

“Well, sort of. But can I come back to that. For this purpose, any of the girls down there could access the system, write down the details and take them with them at the end of the shift”

“Yes, but they’re not allowed handbags or coats at their desks”

“No, But Mr Carter, the size that a lot of them are, they could easily hide a pencil and paper down their bra. And the security guards are all blokes, so they might not check there, although I’m sure they’d like to”

Eric looked at her suspiciously over the top of his half rims, clearly replaying the last comment and reflecting on it

“If you’ve allocated all day, would you like to come to lunch with me? I thought the Coach and Horses would be nice on a day like this”

“Vicki! We’ve got a major issue and you want to take time out for lunch, and anyway I don’t have my car with me”

“We could take mine” she paused as she could see he was thinking about it “If we make sufficient progress?”

“You seem very keen on this idea, and that’s suspicious”

“I just think a large gin and tonic would help me, if we make progress”

“I didn’t think you’d be a gin drinker”

“No, I’m not, but if you had a large gin, I think that would help me”

“Vicki, I invited you because I thought you’d take this seriously. Oh well, I suppose it would ease the strain”

“Good. But before that, I’d like to do a short demonstration. In the form of role play”

“A game? Is this as irrelevant as going to lunch”

“No, Mr Carter. This is the crux of the whole matter”

Again he peered at her over his glasses

“Your son moved flats last week didn’t he?”

Eric looked exasperated “Yes”

“And you hired a van for the purpose?”

“Yes”

“Ok. So just for my demonstration. Please Mr Carter. This will be worth the effort, and believe me it’s all relevant”

“Are you sure”

“I’m sure. Honestly”

“Ok, go on then”

“So you are Mr Carter. And I’m Vicki and I work at the van rental office. Ok. Good morning Mr Carter. I’ve got your van ready for you, Can I take a copy of your licence please for our insurance - Thankyou, and you’ll be paying by cheque I believe”

Eric opened his chequebook “You don’t really want one?”

“No, that’s ok. Just leave it open on the desk, I need that. Thankyou Mr Carter. Now it’s the next day. You’re not in this office but the copy of your licence and the cheque you paid with are. Are they not?”

“I expect so”

“Good”

She picked up the phone on his desk

“Listen carefully” she said as she dialled a number

“Hello” she croaked in a very sick sounding voice, barely distinguishable

She put the phone on speaker so that Eric could hear and held her finger to her lips “Shh”

“Hello” she said again

“Hello, Central Counties Bank, How may I help you?”

“I need to know my balance please”

“I’m sorry, I can hardly hear you, could you speak up”

“I’m sorry, it’s the best I can do. I have throat cancer you see”

“Oh dear, I’m really sorry about that. Could I take your name please?”

“Eric Carter”

“And do you have your account number?”

She pointed to the cheque book, and croaked the number

“Thankyou, and lastly, date of birth?”

She pointed to the licence and read out his d.o.b

“Certainly sir, you have £865.87p”

“Oh dear. That sounds low”

“Well, sir your last transaction was £48.75 to Adamsons van hire on the 12th and before that 186.29 to Diamondi the Jewellers”

“Of course, I forgot that”

She glanced up at Eric, who was now staring at the phone in disbelief

“Can I help you with anything else?”

“Yes. I’d like to transfer £10 to my niece. It’s her birthday”

“Of course. Is she with the bank too?”

“Oh yes”

“And her name?”
“Vicki Smallwood”

“And her account number”

Eric was aghast

“That’s all done for you now. Can I help you with anything else?”

“No thankyou, you have been brilliant”

She pressed the cancel button, and looked over at him

“You just stole £10 from my account!”

She delved into her purse and gave him a ten pound note “And I thought that would pay for lunch.. .. You, see Mr Carter, security is not really very good”

“But I never expected it to be that bad”

“But it is. And that’s the point. That’s why we should be concentrating on this kind of security rather than IT. Anyone wanting to steal our data wouldn’t come in through the IT systems, They’d come in through social engineering”

“Through what”

“Social engineering. Chatting up Call Centre agents. Or just straightforward mis-impersonation, like I just did”

“Well, Yes. You’re right. Again!. But this only exacerbates our troubles. It doesn’t help us with the problem we came in to discuss. This is a new problem that no-one knows about yet”

“Not, really. This is the problem, The issue we came to discuss doesn’t really exist. At least not as a problem”

“You’re losing me again”

“Its not an issue. There is no danger to the company, no danger to any of our customers and no threat from the Regulator if he finds out”

“But the mystery caller to Malcolm?”

“That was me”

“You!”

He started to rise from his chair with his palms firmly pressed onto the desk “You? Vicki. Leaking customer data to third parties is an instantly dismissible offence. I’m probably obliged to sack you right now!”

“Oh, that would be unfortunate because Darren wants to reserve that privilege for himself”

He sat back down, realising that she was hardly fazed by the situation she was now in

“You, see, Mr Carter. Its not really a data leak, because I already had that data. Its not to a third party, because that’s me again, and its not really customer data, because these accounts don’t really exist”

“But Malcolm looked them up”

“And the name on the first account?”

“Michael Ouse”

“Middle initial?”

“em, Martin. So initial M”

“And the Address?”.

“The Studios, Burbank, California”“

“Which is?”

“I’ve no idea”

“Ok try the second one. Surname?”
“Alduck”

“And first name?”

“Don”

“Try writing down the first one - with just the initials”

Eric scribbled MM Ouse

“And the second?”

“Don Alduck”

“And The Studios is actually Walt Disney Studios in California”

“M Mouse. Disney! Donald Duck! Are you telling me that this whole issue is just a joke?”

“Joke...emmm no”

She considered for a moment “Its finding the right word. Its not a prank, because no-one is simple standing laughing at someone’s misfortune. Its not a stunt, which would be done just because it can. Its not a game. No its reciprocation. Revenge, no, Retribution, no. Its more retaliation”

“Retaliation?”

“Yes, against all the new restrictions that Mal has introduced to make our job impossible. And mine in particular. I’ve done this to highlight that: a. Malcolm Bryant doesn’t know enough about the systems or business process to define and implement policy of any kind, and b. that IT security is not the issue”

Eric leaned back in his chair and started to laugh. First quietly, then more out loud almost like choking. Julie burst into the room

“Eric, are you all right!”

“Never better” he chortled “Julie, thankyou. I’m fine, and this girl here is a genius”

“Has she solved the mystery?”

“Solved this problem. And created two more. Bryant will be furious when he finds out”

“Oh, apoplectic I hope. But can I call Audrey. - Audrey, its Vicki in programming. I understand you’re conducting staff interviews. Yes, well, you can call off the search. Yes really. It’s a false alarm. Yes I was told what Mal said, but he’s talking through a hole in his bum. Thanks Aud. And if he asks? Oh, just say you completed yours and he should start interviewing the Call Centre girls instead. – yes all 186 of them. Cheers Aud”

She turned to Eric “Lunch?”

“Is that so? Its all just a false alarm?”

“Yes. But with a purpose”

“Other than to humiliate Mr Bryant?”

“Does it need one?”

“Which is your car then”

“The Lotus just here. Its looks black from most angles, but its dark blue really. Apparently, there’s a technique for remaining lady-like while getting into cars like this, but I haven’t mastered it yet”

“Oh my. I haven’t been in a sports car for, I don’t know when. Friend of mine used to have a Spitfire. The mark 1, back in the sixties, but this is a league up”

“Not convertible though”

“Well at least the roof wont leak. Service is usually good here. We won’t be too long”

“But I think we should continue the task”

“I agree. I was just hoping we’d get to the gin stage before I told you it was all me”

“But you also let slip that Darren wants to fire you”

“Yes, for the Collated Customer Information System, you know, the CCI. He doesn’t agree with it, infringement of human rights or something, and, collating all that data in one place is a major security risk. Oh, and telling him that the script changes he’s asked me to do for the branch cashiers will put an impossible workload onto the call centre, and the changes Simon wants to the main Customer System are impossible because they would need access to more systems simultaneously than Mal will let us have. And telling him to stick his willy in a blender”

Eric looked puzzled

“So how do all these changes fit together. Presumably Darren looks at the inter project impact?”

“I very much doubt it…” she said slowly “…but what I do know is that if he did look at it he wouldn’t understand it”

“But he schedules all the development projects….”
“No, he just allocates them to different people”

“Is that all!”

“It’s a bit like if we hung a large calendar on the programming office door and wrote the programmers name on all the dates till the end of their project, then department heads could come down and write their next project in the next blank date. Except Darren writes it for them. What really needs to happen is that someone, before the projects get scheduled, looks at what conflicts might develop and what synergies can be obtained. That’s where some of the benefits in the merger are supposed to come from”

“But that’s what Darren needs to do, isn’t it?”

“Yes and no, Eric. Yes it needs doing, and no, Darren couldn’t do that. To assess the impact you’d have to know how the business works. None of the middle managers know anything about that, because they all just joined us as part of the takeover and its our systems and processes that we’re migrating them onto which will be different anyway. What I mean is, it's not just how a particular change affects other departments that are horizontal on the org chart, it's how they affect and get implemented by the different levels and grades of staff. There's no point in introducing a change in Retail if you don't take into account the impact on the Call Centre. And there’s no point in agreeing some policy change in the boardroom, if the lower erks third class can't implement it at ground level”

“Like? …. An example?”

“Like you can't decide that every customer service agent should be able to handle every variety of iniquity that turns up as a call so that there’s a one stop resolution for the customer, rather than have some kind of triage. And that's because the mental capacity needed to learn every process is far in excess of the capabilities of your average Call Centre agent. If they had that kind of intellectual capability, they’d be stitching broken brains together in Harley Street, not answering the phone in a bank”

“But if this isn’t being done at all at the moment, there must be massive savings available if it was implemented”
“No doubt. But you need to find someone who knows all the IT systems and all the business departments and how they operate – or at least a substantial percentage of them. And the capacity to learn the rest. I think the only alternative is to have a detailed Strategy published by the Board so that every department can get behind it and implement only the changes they need”

“I think you’re suggesting that that doesn’t exist at the moment”

“Maybe I’m being unfair. Maybe I just don’t understand stuff at that level”

“Hmmm. But I'm still a bit concerned about these accounts in the data that you say didn’t exist, but clearly do”

“Eric. There’s essentially two ways to get at the data. You can go in through a user system, like Finance do to see how much we've got in Investments, or the Call Centre do to see your last transaction. Data accessed this way is usually formatted into legible reports. Could be printed, but usually its on screen. The other way is to scan the database itself looking for a particular point value, and then print or extract the data from there. Data accessed this way is usually unformatted, just one data field after another, so you need to know the data layout to make sense of it. This is the way I tend to look at data unless I'm testing a user system, and it's the way Mal will have accessed it”

“So these accounts do exist”

“Yes, they’re on the files, but they’re not full customer accounts and they're not included in any user reports”

Eric looked sceptical

“Can we play another game?”

“If it helps”

“Ok. I'm the programmer. You are the computer. It's ok. This isn't the master and servant party game where you have to do exactly what you're told. But it's similar”

Eric opened his mouth to say something but thought better of it. Actually, he was more relaxed than he'd been maybe for years, and this morning was the first time he'd laughed that he could remember.

“So the first instructions to the computer is 'read the first item on the menu, say the first three words, read the next item, say the first three words, read the next item, say the first three words.”

Eric picked up the menu. He was beginning to believe that there would be method in the madness, but in any case, it was, shock, fun!

“Prawn cocktail with, Smoked salmon fillet, Home made chicken”

“Ok, so to a user, the system has reported that prawn, salmon and chicken are available for lunch. Now here's an amended program for our computer. “Read the first item on the menu, say the first three words unless they contain the word salmon. Read the next item on the menu. Say the first three words unless they contain the word salmon. Read the next item on the menu. Say the first three words, unless they contain the word salmon”

“Prawn cocktail with, home made chicken”

“So now as a user I never get to know about the salmon. And it's the same with the systems, they're called type 8 records, and they're in virtually every system. Their purpose is to provide test data to ensure that reports and downstream systems are compatible, like they all have fields big enough to handle the largest numbers that we can expect. No point in having a million pounds in your account if the system only prints out a hundred thousand because the report isn't coded to hold enough digits”

“So each system bypasses this data”

“Yes, except when the run time parameter says to include them or exclude everything else, which is faster”

“So that's like a test button?”

“Yes. Although the actual parameter is Adrian”

“Why? Why not Test?”

“I don't know. I guess the first system was written by a girl whose boyfriend was called Adrian. But it's easier to spot ‘Adrian’ than ‘test’ if you're on the phone to the computer room, or up to your ears in stress at 3 a.m. trying to restart the Customer systems”

“But if this data was accidentally included, what impact would it have”

Vicki hesitated

“I'm beginning to realise I need to get nervous when you hesitate”

She smiled a big grin “it would be serious, but not that serious. One of the things these records, sorry accounts do is test field length, so they’re coded to cope with a hundred million. However that would be too risky so instead an algorithm is applied so that the actual numbers are kept below a hundred thousand. So if they were all added in to the top line we'd overstate the company’s net assets by perhaps ten million pounds”

“So it's quite dangerous?”

“Yes, but it's a major feature in testing that gets checked out first”

“So long as everyone knows about it”

“Which they don't. And that brings us straight back to Mal. And Darren for that matter”

“And that's why you've pulled this event. Yes, it's an event, like one of those scenarios that audit throw at us every now and then to test emergency procedures”

“Yes. I needed to highlight that we're going completely the wrong way on security. Locking me down to only being able to access three systems at a time is ridiculous. It makes the changes that Simon has asked for impossible”

“I'm sure you could find a way round it”

“Yes I could. I could just create a shadow database and pour data from everywhere into it one at a time using all sorts of separate jobs. But then we'd all have an alternative source of information. Which one would be right if they differed? Which they would because updates would be at different times overnight, and sooner or later something would fail and need rerun or restarted? We need one definitive version of the truth, not sporadic bunches of data all over the place. What sort of customer data security is that?”

Eric was back to looking serious again

“Hmmm. You also mentioned something about script updates?”

“Yes, for the branch cashiers. It basically says that in lots of circumstances the customer should be told to contact the Call Centre who would have more up to date information”

“But the Branches have the same information as we have at head office, and the Call Centre. Don’t they?”

“Yes. But it's a good way for the Branch to save its training budget and reducing their workload so they don't have to fill their vacancies and can come in under budget on salaries”

Eric peered over his half rims

“So they would pass all those cases to the Call Centre, and they're not geared up for it. Which means their customer response scores will disappear down the toilet”

“And ... Round the U bend. And in any case, its more difficult to sort stuff out over the phone than it is face to face. And I’d prefer to think of it as our customer response scores as part of the Bank rather than just theirs”

Eric was by now looking annoyed and, as a messenger, Vicki started to fear getting shot.

“So who signs all this off?” he retorted crossly “Surely someone is in charge of this”

“Not really. Each division decides what it needs to do, and if it's got budget and can justify it, they press the big red button. Then Dominic checks the maths around the budget and payback, then he passes it to Darren in programming to schedule it and Adam in ops to make sure we have the capacity to develop it and run it. And because you already have a rolling program for hardware upgrades, there almost always is that capacity”

“The way you make it sound, the whole company's a basket case”

“Some of it is, like security. But folks like me down in programming spend most of their lives sorting out bugs, mistakes and anomalies. In order to do that we have to concentrate on where the problems are, so we're bound to come across a big negative at times. It's like a traffic cop thinks the whole world is on a racetrack because he's stopped 10 people today. Never mind the ten thousand that passed by quietly under the speed limit”

“We need a meeting about these security issues. Maria, you know, HR director, and Jane from the Call Centre, Mal from IT and Curtis Monaghan from Physical Security. And I want you there. I want you to lead the discussion like you did today with me”

“Me! Surely Dominic would be more on a par to represent IT”

“You’d not be there to represent IT. I don’t want anyone just fighting their parochial corner. If we did that we’d need someone from Retail and someone from Investment and someone from Treasury. But I do want you there to lead the discussion. I could do it, but I would prefer to focus on taking part. And its about Security in all its forms not just IT, as you so eloquently demonstrated”

“Oh, ok. It's good to get Curt along as well. And one thing he should be looking out for is anyone, especially those who don't earn much, suddenly showing up in the car park with a 30 thousand pound sports car. That would give Audrey's team an immediate focus”

Eric looked suddenly between her and the Lotus

“You didn't win the pools did you? But who else have you spoken to about all this?”

“No-one. I mean, like who? Dominic's a good figure head but he’s not a technical character. Ok, he can talk to department heads and point out some common sense. Darren’s just a scheduler. Neither of them know enough about anything to do any of this. Dom is largely non-technical and Darren is from Northern Cities, like Mal is as well. Our own Middle managers here at County decided to move on rather than cope with the inevitable battle. Just because you’ve spent 15 years in IT doesn’t mean you know anything about the systems in a new company you’ve joined. Eric, who else can I turn to?”

“Well, Steve Hardy for a start. He’s head of Audit. He should take some responsible for customer data security”

“Mr Hardy! He’s a director! I can’t just bundle into a director’s office and say, Steve you’re doing a lousy job of looking after our customer details”

“Well, I’m a director as well!”

“Yes, I appreciate that. But you invited me”

And with all that to think about she went home to move out of Pete’s flat. Which also meant that she wasn’t at home when Tristan phoned.

“Hello”

“Hi there. Would it be possible to talk to Vicki, please?”

“I'm sorry, but she's out at the moment”

“And are you her mum?”

“Yes” she said hesitantly

“Hi. Mrs Smallwood. It's Tristan here. I don't know if Vicki's mentioned me, but we're supposed to be meeting up on Friday evening. I guess she's still moving out of her flat with her dad”

“Yes, they didn't think it would take long. I was expecting them back by now”

“Probably gone down the pub”

“Wouldn't be the first time. She still likes to chat to her dad”

“That would be good. She's got a lot going on”

“So it seems, but I seem to get only half the story”

“Well, maybe I could fill you in a bit, as far as I know anyway. You see, it all seems to stem from this system she's been asked to write. It collates a lot of data that used to be kept separate, and it seems that some people are finding this a bit controversial. They're also in the aftermath of a takeover which is merging the IT departments, and that's never easy. One of the guys who's against this system is her new boss, which makes things a bit awkward, but she was asked to do it by the guy above that, so rather than take on his boss he's just trying to sabotage her work. Just keeps interrupting so she can't get anything done. In programming you need peace and quiet and continuity, or you forget all he numbers you need to keep in your head while you're writing, and, well, then you have to start again”

“So what sort if things was he doing to interrupt?”

“Oh, asking her questions about other systems, asking her about the way things worked, telling her he's booked dinner for them together, you know that kind of thing. What colour underwear are you wearing”

She gasped. “Pink, I think”

“No, no. Not you, Mrs Smallwood! I meant that was one of the questions he was asking as an interrupt….”

But by then they had both descended into a fit of the giggles

“You could call me Lauren rather than Mrs Smallwood”

“Ok, Lauren. By the way, is that your real name or is that just so that if someone phones up asking for Lauren, you'll know it's me and can pretend to be the cleaner?”

More laughter, until Lauren continued

“But, you met in a pub, didn't you?”

“Yes, did she give you any details?”

“No”

“Ok. Well, the short story is that I'm having a beer in this pub, and she's in the pub as well. All of a sudden, this big guy with bloodshot eyes and a mad look busts in and starts making demands for food and drinks. But the kitchen has closed, so he goes a bit berserk and a fight breaks out. I help to get this nutter out through the door, and then realise that everyone else has vanished except Vicki. She's a big shaken up so we find somewhere to have a drink together. And that’s how we met. Anyway Mrs Smallwood, could you give her a message from me”

“Of course”

“I need to change my train, so can she meet me in Warwick instead of Coventry. Should get in at around twenty past five”

“I’ll do that”

“Thank you so much. Its really nice talking to you”

“And to you, Tristan”

Her meeting

Vicki spent all day Friday writing notes for her security meeting. She knew she’d probably not refer to them at all but just writing them made it all a bit clearer in her own head. She had remarkably few phone calls to interrupt her and kept her head down looking like she was in deep thought. She knew Darren was desperate to know what she was up to but she also knew that he knew better than to ask which would only give her another good reason to give him short shrift.

The call from Julie in Eric’s office was perplexing. She was leaving Vicki off the invite list. Not that she shouldn’t be there, but Eric was going to introduce it as her meeting and of course she didn’t need an invitation to her own meeting. That would retain a certain suspense and catch everyone off balance when she did her call centre mis-impersonation trick. And that was the first she’d heard of doing that all over again.

Shakespeare Theatre

Four o’clock rolled in and she was out exactly as planned. She met Tristan outside the station but because she was double parked, she'd stayed in the drivers seat. And that meant she was driving. He stretched back in his seat

“I could get used to this chauffeur treatment”

“And I could get used to driving a Lotus”

She disappeared to the loo as soon as they got to the theatre. The show was due to start at seven, but it would be over by nine fifteen and Vicki was hoping that that would be dinner time. Pity she'd missed lunch.

Time was pressing on but Tristan was in conversation with two older men when she returned. He slipped his arm round her and pulled her in for the introduction

“Guys, this is my girlfriend Vicki. Vicki this is Al Florantini. I do a lot of work for him in the city, but you may have heard of him because he also writes the financial leader in the Telegraph most weeks.....”

“Delighted to meet you, Vicki. And what is it you do?”

“I work for Central Counties Bank in Birmingham. I'm in IT”

“And this is Oliver Bailey. He's CEO of a bank but Olly, I'm sorry, I never did find out which one?”

“Central Counties, Al. Are you going senile! Or is it just forgetful? I’m sure you used to know that....”

“…Oops…”

“But forgive for being presumptuous, but you wouldn't be Vicki Smallwood, would you...?”

She went seven shades redder as she nodded

“So you’re the young lady that's being winding up old Eric?.... Ah ha! And the perpetrator of some interesting security stunt…”

She nodded again as he continued “but of course, we'll not discuss that now. Al has a habit of letting that sort of stuff infiltrate his column on a Saturday”

“Emm, yes ...” she finally managed to say “but I'm so sorry I didn't recognise you”

“Not at all. I tend to keep to the fifth floor and leave day to day operation to the department directors - except in exceptional circumstances”

“No, but your picture is on the results flyer every six months. I just find recognising people is different when it's out of context”

The ushers were now becoming impatient and they all headed for their seats. Because Al had got Tristan’s tickets for him all four seats were together but a group of four disorganised ladies was blocking the end of the row. Apparently, two of the party were relatively infirm and may need to leave at short notice. Could they possibly swop seats so that they were at the end of the row? No one saw a problem with this, but the performance was starting and it wasn't about to wait for this reshuffle. In relative confusion, Al took the lead and headed in first, followed by Tristan then Oliver and finally Vicki. This was hardly the plan, she was due to go to the theatre as a date with Tristan, not her chief executive. But they would have had relatively little communication during the performance anyway, so maybe it didn't matter. Instead, Oliver kept her amused, occasionally whispering comments in her ear and she in turn responded with her own brand of humour.

They reorganised at the interval. Al stayed in the same seat as he was now on whispering terms with the lady next to him, then Tris then Vicki and finally Oliver, who was still in a position to make the odd comment to her.

She tried to pay enough attention to follow the plot. Shakespeare was never really her thing, but Tris had said that tickets to this event were as rare as rocking horse poo and she felt honoured to have been invited.

“Have you chaps eaten?” asked Al as they found themselves dispersing with the flow out in the fresh air “or are you just headed for a pint?”

“I could do with a bite, but we'll struggle to find somewhere”

“I've got a table at the Riverside Lodge. Lets see if they can reset it for four”

“Four rather than two! It shouldn't be a problem, sir. The name on the reservation please?”

“Vicki” replied Tristan all too quickly “I put your name on it so that you could pay the bill”

Al fell about

“You did what!”

“It's not so much doing that, as getting away with it” added Oliver, equally bemused as Vicki's jaws dropped open in disbelief “Gee, thanks, Tris”

Conversation over dinner was surprisingly inclusive and it wasn't until near midnight that Al was taking the opportunity to ask Tristan about a little project he had in mind.

Oliver listened in for a few moments, then turned to Vicki

“Eric really is quite spooked by recent events”

“Yes, but he's learned how to laugh again too.”

“And that's not a bad thing. But you know something about the CCI as well, if I'm not mistaken”

“Yes, I wrote it”

“So you'd know about our offshore issue?”

“I'm not sure if I’m even allowed to admit that, never mind talk about it. Even to you”

“But that all came out from live data because you ran it live, straight away?”

“Yes, to prove that if it didn't work it would have been sabotaged, not that I couldn't get it to work in the first place”

“Is that likely? Sabotage”

“I believe so “

'Sabotage?” joined Al “is this a seriously meaty scandal?”

“Not really, Al, it's just a minor technical issue regarding program control parameters” replied Vicki to try to close the subject

“Oh. Pity” he sounded, disappointed

“I still think I’d like to know about it” said Oliver really quietly “ I'd like you to come up and explain it to me. Monday, ten o'clock. Yes?”

It was a late night, and on top of a heavy week neither Tris or Vicki was in any rush.

Late brunch was on the menu and then a beach walk in the afternoon. They took the car to a more remote bay and wandered slowly along the waterline talking quietly about work and Tristans flat and what fun filled events Vicki had lined up for the following week.

Dinner was wonderfully opulent. One thing she’d noticed is that Tristan did not appear to be short of money. But then, being in demand, in the City, he had presumably set his rates suitable high. He had agreed to do a substantial piece of work for Al, and was due to finalise that on Monday in London. After that he’d work something out so that they could see each other again before the weekend.

Lauren Again

Russ decided he ought to lay the table. Dinner was all under control, and this was just the finishing touch but Lauren seemed to have disappeared upstairs somewhere. And Vicki and new boyfriend Tristan were due any minute.

He looked up as he heard her enter the room.

“Oh my goodness, I didn't know we were supposed to get dressed up”

“I'm sorry?”

“You haven't worn anything like that for ages. Not that I'm complaining, you look lovely”.

“I just thought I'd make an extra effort. Vicki seems really keen on him, and I don't want to let the side down”

“Lauren, she's only known him for less than a month”

“Yes, but it's only the start”

“Well. That's what you said about Peter, and that finished abruptly, and the boy before that, Martin, or Melvin or something”

They were interrupted by the doorbell and the latch turning.

Vicki made the introductions and Tristan held out the gifts he'd brought, the numbered bottle of wine and a large heart shaped box of artisan chocolates.

“Oh thankyou so much gasped Lauren, they're lovely, and heart shaped too!”

“Yes, I thought that might be appropriate after our last conversation”

Vicki prodded him in the right kidney

“I do hope you're not going to say anything inappropriate”

Lauren raised a relaxed smile. It looked as though Tristan was going to live up to the image of him she had invented when he was on the phone

“Of course not, although I was going to ask your mum what colour under....”

He stopped suddenly as another finger bruised his right kidney and Lauren's eyes opened wide and her jaw dropped slightly in disbelieving anticipation

“Ooh” gasped Tristan “Vicki! I was only trying to ask what type of undercoat they'd used to get this level of sheen on the wall paint”

Lauren, tried unsuccessfully to stifle a laugh and a giggle

“Sorry Lauren, But what did you think I was going to say?” he asked with as much innocence as he could muster. But she only broke into a huge smile and shook her head slowly

“Tris! Mum! Have I lost the plot already!”

“I certainly have” said Russ “why don't you come into the lounge and sit down”

“Thankyou, unless Lauren needs any help in the kitchen. I'm not one to sit and watch if there's things to do”

“I'm not sure I want to let you loose in the kitchen with mum!”

“Oh spoil sport!”

“Mother!”

But on balance Tristan seemed to be a hit with her parents – definitely mum, and probably dad..

This was more like it. Pete had been independent, and steady with long term potential for promotion in his company. But that was his focus and Vicki had frequently felt in second place or just left out completely. Tristan was different – in every way. He’d already made his reputation. He worked for himself. He was well respected. He talked at CEO level and he even had time left over for fun, frivolity and humour.

Monday saw Vicki back in her office suitably early. She was looking forward to her meeting with Oliver and she’d done her preparation for Tuesday’s security meeting with Eric. Darren arrived looking as smug as ever. She frowned to herself. Of course! He would still be under the impression that the CCI

had failed on an access error. And there was an outside chance that Mal might also be of that opinion – if he wasn’t still interviewing Call Centre agents about Mickey Mouse. What sort of fallout would that create? How mad would he be when he found out?

A solitary, dejected figure was heading her way. Hi Marcia! What brings you up to this end?”
“Hi Vicki. You don’t happen to know anything about the HR system do you?”
“Maybe, why?”
“Its failed. It was running fine right up until half an hour ago. Then Ops stopped it, and restarted it and it failed almost immediately”
“But its been running ok for years. So what’s changed?”

“Nothing. There isn’t even a new version in testing”

Vicki accompanied her back to her desk. She had no idea where to start, but that had never stopped her before.

“We’re looking for something different. Something that’s changed”

“Adam says there’s been no changes his end, and it isn’t a new version”
“Ok, so what run time parameters does it use?”
“None, usually”
“So what’s all these 10 lines here. Are they usually commented out or something?”
Marcia looked at the listing. It was bound to have been something simple, now she had a lead on what it might be.

“So who put this in? Is this why Ops had to stop and restart it? Lets find out who asked for this”
She phoned Adam. Yes. Mal had asked for these parameters to be included, but it had failed two minutes in and they’d given the problem to Marcia.

“Ok, should I phone Mal and ask him what its about?”
“No Marcia, its more important that the system gets back on line. Comment these out, get Adam to restart and I’ll phone Mal for you. Ok?”

“Bryant”

“Hi Mal. How are you today? Its Vicki here, Vicki Smallwood”

“Vicki. What do you want? If its anything to do with redaction of passwords on that CCI of yours the answer is no”

“No Mal. Nothing to do with that”
“But it failed on an access error, I’m told”
“Yes Mal, it did. But this is something different. The paraments that you put into the HR system, Mal. What do they do?”
“I can’t tell you that”

“Oh. Pity. Because they crashed the system, so I took them out to get HR back and running. Although I appreciate some say it would be better if it wasn’t”

“Took them out! You’ve no authority to do that!”
“No, probably not. But I thought I’d get the business back into production anyway”

Branch 237

She got back to her desk just in time to catch the phone that was ringing off the hook.

“Hi Vicki, its me, Tristan”

“Hey! Hi, you ok?”
“Yes. But did you know you left a dozen pages of your report in the hotel room?”
“Did I?”
“Maybe you meant to go through it with me or something, but we never got round to it. Anyway, I’ve got it here if you’ve been looking for it”

“Thanks Tris”

“So, Vicki, because I’ve been sitting in a luxury reception area for an hour and a half waiting for Al, I’ve been looking at it. Have you got some pages there? Look, the Branch Detail system report….”

This was worrying. Maybe there was a bug in her code and the numbers didn’t add up after all.. She didn’t have those pages, so she couldn’t check it directly. But maybe she could rerun it. She set the parameters for a partial run and submitted it.

“Not found. Not found? Not found! That’s impossible, How can it be not found!”

“Sorry babe, Adams not here right now. Not found error? Means its not in the library. You’ve not migrated it to production, maybe”

Which means – which means, someone deleted it – all of it. Someone has deleted my system!

She sank onto her chair. Oh my. Of all the disasters I might have been expecting, this wasn’t one of them. She phoned Adam again. This time he was there but offering no consolation

“Vicki, if it was there, which it must have been, and it isn’t now, then someone’s deleted it. If it had been in the production library it would have been protected, but in your development area there’s no control”

“No. And neither should there be”

In a panic she phoned Tristan and quietly blurted out the revelation. Tristan, however was unfazed.

“Ok, Vicki. There’s a good chance it is still there…”
“No, Tris, its been deleted”
“Yes, but it might just be hiding. It’ll stay on the disk, except the space it takes up will be marked as free. But it will still be there until those sectors of the disk get overwritten by something new. Try this…”

She typed in the numbers he was feeding her and sure enough the disk index table appeared

“Tris its there!”

“Yes, but it’ll be marked as deleted. Go to that box and use the tab key to toggle it to restore”

“You mean… its back now……”
“Try running it”

“Oh good grief! Is there any magic you can’t perform! Gotta go. I’ll be late for my meeting with Oliver…”

“Just a sec! Change the file type to ‘hidden’”

“Tris!” she panicked as he finished talking her through the commands “Its gone again. Gone off the screen!”

“Yes. The system will find it when you run it, but it wont appear in normal listings. Its used to hide system files which are of no value to a regular programmer and it stops people asking questions and messing with them”

Ok, so that was worth the extra minute.

She flew up to the computer room, and her obvious desperation persuaded Adam to agree to retrieve her printout when it appeared and hold on to it rather than have it distributed to her desk, then back up to the fifth floor and along to the CEOs office.

As expected he was only mildly interested in her problems and not at all interested in her code or the techniques she used to make sure it could run. What he was interested in were the details of the offshore issue, her continuous interruptions and then the security issues that Eric had partially explained to him. She told him about the Tuesday security meeting and he seemed much happier knowing that it was being addressed as a matter of priority.

But that meeting with Oliver was nerve wracking. She simply wasn’t used to talking to people like that. Their priorities were different and their focus tended to be on things she didn’t understand, like the impact on the Regulator or the Shareholders. But she thought she’d succeeded in her attempt to avoid the technicalities while nor over-simplifying it. By the end of it, coffee was overdue, but collecting her printout from Adam was a higher priority Then find somewhere quiet to see what Tristan was talking about.

She scanned through the output. The offshore funds transfers issue was very high value, but apart from giving them some grief with the Regulator, she had no real idea why it was a problem. This new issue however, was eminently understandable even if the values were much lower. Still a million pounds though, so significant enough.

Again the priorities were getting muddled. This new revelation needed more investigation, but it was more important to take an offline copy of the CCI just in case someone found out it had been restored although there’d be no reason for anyone to suspect the resurrection. If it was Mal or Darren, they wouldn’t even know a resurrection was possible. After all, she didn’t!

The next day, she got in early to submit another run hoping it all might be less manic. Hopefully now she could calm down. The previous cup of coffee was still on her desk as she collapsed onto her chair and now, just maybe, she could drink this one and take a minute to get her thoughts together ahead of her meeting.

Or maybe not.

Darren appeared at the door and was diverting towards her with “Don’t you go disappearing again. I’ve got a new assignment for you. Needs to be done this week” as he peered over her shoulder

“What are you doing with the HR system. That’s not on your schedule”
“It crashed yesterday and Marcia asked me to help her with it. I’ll have to go and see Adam about authorising run-time parameter changes and backup discs”

“HR system? Because that’s Marcia’s, not yours”
“And others. And she doesn’t have access to the computer room”

“Don’t think you can run away on that excuse. Now, this new assignment”

“Sorry Darren. I’m running a meeting in ten minutes”

“Well cancel it. This is important”

“No can do”

“Well, may I remind you that I schedule things around here”

He stood simmering for several moments while Vicki took a quiet sip of her coffee, before collecting her papers and walking off without another word.

“Where to you think you’re going?” he demanded loudly

She stopped and turned “I told you. I’ve got a meeting to go to”

“We’ll I’ve got a new project for you, and that is the priority”

“I don’t think so. I need to be at this meeting. Eric’s asked me to chair it. I’ve got some important people coming to this and I have no intention of disappointing them”

“I have a good mind to report your behaviour to HR”

“I’ll save you the trouble. Maria herself will be at my meeting”

Darren’s face fell. His attempt at exhorting his seniority looked like it might fall by the wayside in shreds.

“Is that so? What’s it about?”

“Security”

“What? IT security? That’s Mal’s department not yours”

“No, this is wider than just IT. Gotta fly, don’t want to be late”

Darren was steaming. Well, if Vicki was chairing it, it can’t be that important. He followed her to the third floor meeting room and quietly took a seat, but this was not what he was expecting. Mal was there of course, And Maria! Oh my! HR director, just as she’d said. Jane, customer contact director. Oh god! Steve Hudson, Director of Audit and Regulation. Eric, support services director and IT department boss. But it was too late now to escape, to back out saying he’d got the wrong meeting, that would make him look like a right prat.

Mal looked over at him as if to ask what he was doing here, but Vicki was intent on opening the meeting right on time.

“Can I assume that everyone here knows everyone else?”

But they didn’t and Vicki introduced Darren as the manager responsible for scheduling programming resources. Darren was seething. What was wrong with a simple “that’s my boss”

She opened with the introduction that she’d used with Eric, but this time he moved the discussion forward with the others,

“Steve, I told you that Vicki would be looking for a volunteer to help her with her demonstration”
“Is this to do with hiring a van, Eric? I wasn’t so much confused as intrigued”

But all this did was to increase the suspicion.

“Ok” she hesitated picking up the cue. This had raised the stakes. She had never been in a meeting with Steve before. She didn’t know him at all

“Yes. I’d like to open with a little demonstration. It’s a kind of role play. Steve, your daughter moved into a new flat last week and you hired a van to help her. At the van hire company you decide to play a little game to tease the attractive assistant to get her attention– that’s me”

This was different. This was not just talking and the room was surprisingly quiet

She moved round to where he was sitting and dropping her purse in front of him

“You start by taking a £20 note from my purse and hide it somewhere, perhaps in a pocket, where I might not get it back……”

Steve stood up. Eying her suspiciously and making some show of how far down in his trouser pocket he was pushing that note.

“Hey! Did you just pinch £20 from my purse? I’ll bet that’s only because you want me to try to retrieve it, isn’t it?”

“Yes, or it will pay for your rounds when we go out tonight” he replied, reading the script she’d pushed in front of him

“Hmmm” she frowned towards to rest of the meeting “Except, I don’t want to go out with him, and I wouldn’t want to spend £20 on drinks even if I did. And I think I might need less of an audience to try to retrieve it from there…”

She was intending to wait for a few tense seconds of muffled laughter before continuing but was interrupted by the meeting room door creaking open

“Oh, hi. Are you joining us? I’ll rewind to the beginning if you are”

Darren recognised him. Never spoke to him, but knew who he was. Well, it pays to be able to recognise your CEO. So who’s he going to haul out?

“Sorry to interrupt. What time will this finish?”

“12 o’clock”

“Ok. Vicki, one o’clock. Don’t be late”

“Ooh. Sounds like lunch time. Ok Oliver”

Darren steamed. Not just the CEO, but she’d invited herself to lunch with him!

“Wow. Good job I decided against a retrieval attempt, Steve!”

Steve smiled at her. He was beginning to enjoy this, whatever it was designed to prove, and it was certainly designed to gain attention

“I think you ought to give it back, Steve, or it could get rather embarrassing ….” started Jane

“No, Jane. I’m going to demonstrate a less intimate way to get it back”

This was much more melodramatic than the first time but Eric knew what to expect and the room went silent and she ran through the call as before

“….And that means that we have no idea on how much might be going missing?” opened Steve

“That’s right. For small amounts, like five pounds, many people wouldn’t notice, and then might think its something they’ve forgotten so they might not even query it”
“For larger amounts….”
“Like twenty quid!” interrupted Eric

“Oh, much larger than that” she replied with a flirty smile “they might run dozens of these calls in quick succession, and maybe to other Banks as well, then close the destination account and vanish before anyone complained”

Steve was first to comment, and Vicki expanded

“ Yes, account numbers and date of birth are effectively public information”

“Ok but how often would anyone find those out, apart from car hire secretaries?”

She explained that anyone in the contact centre, anyone in IT, anyone in audit, anyone in a branch….”

“You mean” said Maria “anyone who works at the Bank”

“Yes. And anyone outside who accepts a cheque and needs personal ID. like if you’re posting an international parcel or a travel agent”

The magnitude of the situation started to sink in as Eric led the discussion on how to address the issue and Oliver returned

“Thought it’d take longer, but I’ll join you for the second half if you don’t mind”

“Not at all. You’re welcome”

“But you missed the excitement” said Steve “Vicki’s tried and tested way to misappropriate money out of company personal accounts”

“That’s a bit rash, Vicki. Committing theft with such an eminent audience”

“It was only to redress the balance. But it was to prove just how easy it is to do”

Olly nodded “but your CCI isn’t going to help us with that as well, is it?”

“No, the CCI isn’t live yet. It has database access issues” corrected Darren, thankful that he finally had something to contribute

“Not live? But it’s producing some astonishing results! Vicki?”

“Sorry everyone. I need to resort to being pedantic. Technically the CCI is not live because it is still in a test library. But it is set to run against the live databases so the output is complete, valid, accurate corporate information”

Darren shifted uncomfortably in his chair. He noticed that Mal was looking decided agitated.

“That…” he fumed “…is contrary to corporate security policy”

“Yes” Vicki shot back “that’s the sort of nonsense that security is focussed on, instead of preventing theft by mis-impersonation and other social engineering techniques. Security has been focussed on soft, easy targets so that it looks like its doing something instead of addressing major corporate loopholes, and that’s why we’re here in this meeting. This technique is just the tip of the iceberg”

Mal seethed in his chair, breaking out into something of a sweat

“Just out of interest, Vicki, why have you kept it in test when Eric and I have no issue signing it off?”

“Because in test, Steve, I can change it as often as I like. If it was live I’d need to go through change control and get time and budget signed off”

Both Eric and Steve burst out laughing, and the others allowed themselves a quiet snigger. All except Mal and Darren who were now all but apoplectic.

“Are there, Vicki, any policies in this company that you do not contravene?”

“Not that I’m aware of…” more laughter “…but it’s all in the best interests of the company”

“So what kind of changes have you been making?”

“I’d rather not say. I mean, not be too specific” but the look from Eric told her she wasn’t going to get away with that

“Eric, I need to check results before I go public”

“You mean some of the output may not be accurate”

“Yes. Yes it is, but I’d prefer to double check the new data I’ve added because any errors would adversely impact confidence in the whole system And that’s enough said, Eric”

Darren had gone white. Mal had gone crimson.. he was furious. Not only did it appear that the CCI was working despite his concerted efforts, but that she was adding even more data, like adding more insult to injury.

But time had folded in on them and she decided it was time to summarise and close.

“We’ve managed to retain a level of realism, we’ve not got bogged down in minutia, we’ve discussed some serious corporate issues and come up with some possible solutions to consider. I would say that was quite successful. Eric?”

But it was Steve that answered

“I think this may be a first, where we get Vicki to chair the meeting so that the rest of us can concentrate on content, so Eric, thank you for that. I doubt it will be the last. And yes, serious issues but retaining a sense of perspective”

“And Mal” continued Eric “I have a meeting with Simon later this week about his new customer system. I understand that the new IT security restrictions that you’ve introduced will make it impossible and I’d like you to brief me before that meeting on the logic behind those changes”

“And Vicki…” finished Steve “… I want to know what you’ve been up to”

“I can believe that. I expect Oliver does too”

“Yes. I think I’ll drop in on that one o’clock meeting”

“What, Steve, you’re crashing my lunch date!”

Eric smiled to himself. How does she ever get away with it. But before that she had some explaining to do.

Following the revelation that the CCI was indeed operational, Mal had fled from the meeting as Vicki closed it, catching Darren half way down the stairs. The row was in danger of becoming violent - you told me it wasn’t running - I told you it wasn’t live - you know what’ll happen next - only if she links in Branch Reconciliation and she can’t do that because that system is on hold pending negotiations with the Trades Unions because it could affect staffing levels”

“I can't imagine she either knows or cares about that. Not on her recent track record.

Steve’s office was rather busy when she got there. She’d delayed herself by popping into the loo on the way and now she was last to arrive. Not only was Steve there but Olly and Eric and Curtis as well as Steve’s PA who was organising coffee.

“Vicki, it’s a long time since I’ve been closed down like that in an open meeting. But based on recent history, I’m assuming there’s a good reason for it?”

“Sorry Eric, but yes, there is. And I’ll get to that. Oliver, what was it you specifically wanted?”

“Oh, a number of things. But we’ll pick those up over lunch which will be at one o’clock”

“So, Vicki. New data? And is this in danger of giving me a heart attack”

“No, no heart attacks today, Eric. But I think you’ll find this interesting.

It’s a case of theft, or possibly embezzlement. It’s at branch level and to understand it you need a rudimentary knowledge of the fundamental business processes in the branch.

“Business process?” queried Steve again “I thought you were IT”

“Yes, I am. But to write and implement an IT system properly you need to understand what the business is trying to achieve or your finished system is unlikely to support it and, yet again, the business will have to change the way it works to fit in with the computer. That is the wrong way round. And that means I need to know the business process”

“I doubt if Darren Parmenter would agree with you”

“Quite probably. There is little that Darren Parmenter and I agree on, but I still know who’s right”

But, she thought before continuing, if Darren’s bum and head exchanged places you’d get more sense out of him. But instead of saying that she continued with the task in hand.

“Our process is slightly different, but in the branches we acquired from Cities, its like this. During the day, the branch accumulates hard cash. Each transaction is entered into their terminal and transmitted to the centre, here, where it updates the main customer database. They put all the money into bags, balancing notes and coins to make sure the bag isn’t too heavy. These are collected by secure courier and brought here to head office. The exact amounts are added up by the till and output to a floppy disk which is put in the bag with the money every time the till is cleared down which can be several times a day. The money itself is counted again by Treasury when it gets here and it is that amount that is entered into the system for the Finance and Investment departments.

This process dates from before they had computers and hasn’t changed for decades. Occasionally, audit would take all the floppy disks from a day and add them together and compare that to the amount of hard cash as a primitive cross check to the Treasury system. However, if a whole bag, complete with its floppy disk disappeared, it would be impossible to trace without adding up every transaction in the customer system for that date and that branch. And before you even started that, you’d need to have reason for suspicion. No-one has ever done that because no-one would know where to start. However, by using the CCI system, it is possible to intercept all the transactions according to a certain criteria, such as branch number.

I haven’t written any code to automatically compare this branch total to the Treasury system, however, it can be compared manually quite easily from the summary reports. Almost always, the transactions system matches the count from Treasury, which is what you would expect”

She paused momentarily for emphasis checking that everyone was still listening

“Except, for Branch 237, because it doesn’t. There’s an anomaly. It’s as if a bag is missing. Usually containing about a thousand pounds. Everyday.”

“A thousand pounds? Every day? Someone’s walking out with it?”

“At least”

“It can’t be Secure Transport Limited, surely” added Curtis, now sitting on the edge of his chair. This is the first he’d heard even a vague rumour of money going missing from a branch and, being physical security, it sounded like it was going to be his problem

“And it can’t be an employee just waking out with it” he continued “they’re tagged. And if you walk out through the door, the alarm will go off”

“Yes, that’s right Curt, but let me continue. The same type of bags are also used by our customers who deposit money after the branch is closed. They have a code to put their bag into the secure safety deposit box that’s accessible from outside in the street. So, Curt, the bag is not being taken out through the door. It never leaves the branch. What happens is that it is put into a deposit box from the inside. And then next morning it’s taken out again and paid into the accounts that are referenced on the paying-in slips”

“So all we need to do is look for a paying-in slip for that amount and we’d know who it was!”

“Yes, if there was a paid in value the same as the discrepancy. Which there isn’t. What you need to do is find two or even three paying in slips in the customer transactions system that together add up to the discrepancy amount. That’s another level of complexity because doing that manually would be all but impossible. But it doesn’t take long to code something that will look for this, if you have some idea what you’re looking for to start with…”

“…and you’ve already done that. Right?”

“Yes. And that identifies the suspects. This first of these is a branch employee, Joyce Reveller…”

“Does that name mean anything to anyone?”

“Yes, Steve. Joyce is Darren Parmenter’s wife. Darren who has been derailing the CCI development since it started. Reveller is her maiden name”

“So that could be a motive behind his behaviour, and that’s why you couldn’t divulge this at the security meeting. But you said there were two…”

“Yes there are two or even three pay-in slips, but always two people. Joyce is one, and the other half goes to…..Mal Bryant.”

“The, Mal Bryant? “

“Is there more than one?”

“I checked out the addresses on the customer file for these account numbers and those addresses check out against Joyce and Mal’s addresses on the HR system, and sure enough you can see these amounts on their personal account statements”

“So, surely they stopped when the CCI went live and started producing results by bringing all that data together” suggested Steve

“No. Because the CCI isn’t live and until this morning the only people that knew that the CCI is operational are in this room plus Adam in operations. Everyone else who knew anything about it thinks that it failed with an access error”

“That’s what Mal told me”

“And that was the case, so he’s not wrong. But I corrected it. Except now he does know that and so does Darren. But there’s something else. Early today, the CCI system was deleted from the main libraries. I came to run it to confirm the data for this meeting and it was simply not there”
“More sabotage from Darren” speculated Eric

“I expect so. I haven’t checked the log yet, but the evidence should be there unless there’s a systems crash or something else wipes it all out.

“Vicki, have you any idea how long this has been going on? Or even a way of finding out?”
“I already checked the historic statements database…”
“Vicki, you don’t have access to that system as well do you?” wailed Eric with some dismay

“Eric, I can say with some confidence that there is no data held in our computer systems that I cannot access, but to return to the case, the historic statements system would indicate that a daily amount corresponding roughly to one bag has been paid into those accounts for at least five years. Oh, except one thing I forgot to tell you. There are some notable exceptions to the daily payment. There are some gaps of between 1 and 10 days. However, these gaps coincide, possibly by pure coincidence, to the days holiday booked by Joyce Parmenter in the HR system”

A stoney silence meandered round the table until Steve raised his head

“So this pair have leached over one and a half million on an ongoing basis…”

“But why Mal and Darren’s wife?”

Vicki shook her head “As far as I know we don’t keep records of personal relationships in our systems so I have no idea”

“And the CCI?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t checked yet on the extent of the damage. I don’t want to speculate. I think the whole library was affected, which would include the source code as well. Oh Eric, I’m so glad I took that risk and ran it live last week”

“Its certainly showing its power” commented Oliver

“Yes…” replied Eric in an attempt to recover some credibility for his department “It’s the first thing Dominic did in his new role”

But Vicki was subdued now as she walked slowly back to her office. Steve had recognised the potential of the CCI and supported it, but the success would go to the department and someone like Dominic would take credit riding on the back of all her hard work. After all, he commissioned it. Maybe the answer to everything was to follow Tristan back to London and get a job there instead.

Darren was still at his desk, scouring the contents of his terminal. He hadn’t looked up. He hadn’t acknowledged her return. He hadn’t scowled or hissed at her.

“Have you lost something, Darren” she asked quietly “Like, you look like you’re hunting for something?”
“Yeah. That lousy CCI of yours. Dominic wants it promoted to production but I cant find it anywhere”
“No, I’d rather you didn’t. Its so much easier making changes when its in the development library than if I have to go through tedious Change Control. But anyway Mal Bryant deleted it”

“Deleted it! Why?”

“Don’t you know already?”
“Know what?”

“Just another issue it raised”

“At least you can’t add any more to it if its not there”

“True. I’d have to put it back first”

“So what am I supposed to tell Dominic!”

“Tell him Mal deleted it”

“Deleted it? Vicki mentioned that, but with no explanation. Do you know why? Well lets go and ask him”

The sight of the CEO with a face like thunder marching through the IT department was not a pleasant experience. Mal was nowhere to be seen, but Oliver migrated towards Vicki’s desk and his conversation with Dominic was less than secretive

“That CCI is the cornerstone of our defence with the Regulator. That is the system that will help to identify and prevent a re-occurrence of recent revelations. It is worth tens of millions of pounds. Unless he has some cast iron reason for this, you will sack him as soon as he re-appears in this office. Vicki, do you know how to freeze sign-ons to prevent systems access?”
“Yes, Oliver. You mean, like maybe Mal? I could do it, but I’d prefer to delegate it to Adam in Operations. Then he’ll know not to allow any reversal or re-instatement. I’ll do that now, but I’ll tell him its on your instruction”

Darren hid his head in his screen. Oh my! Is there anything in this department that she can’t do? And simply saying that she’s not allowed to seems to make no difference whatsoever.

Next day, Vicki was late in. She said hi to Darren and moved on swiftly to the coffee machine before immersing herself in her screen.

“I need to talk to you about…..”

“Darren, not now. I’m busy”

“I am the manager of this section and you will….”

She stood up turning sharply to face him with unusual gravity

“I need to present something to Steve in fifteen minutes. I do not want to have to disappoint him citing your interference. Now get off my back”

She sat back down and continued while a steely silence pervaded the office.

“That…. Is not an acceptable response!” as he tried to look over her shoulder at whatever it was that was vitally important

She ignored him “Ah! Got it. Just need to print that”

Darren made a lunge towards the printer expecting to intercept it but only succeeded in getting in her way as she collected her handbag to head for the door

“What are you playing at, you dumb buffoon, I’m not printing it here! I’ve sent it to the printer in Steve’s office”

“But cross department printing needs security clearance!”

“Yes. And it wont be long around here before breathing needs security clearance too”

Eric interrupted his impromptu corridor meeting as she squeezed past on the fifth floor “good morning Vicki. Oh my! Are you all right?”

“No, Eric. But thank you for asking and I’m nearly late for Steve”

He tailed her into Steve’s office and invited himself to join them

“Darren’s in, being a nuisance. But Mal isn’t so I think we’re on a short timescale. He knows we’re on the case”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because he tried to kill me. He drove me off the road yesterday. I managed to out-brake him and raised a lot of dust from the verge but then I swerved round him and outpaced him on the bypass. That Lotus is seriously quick and its like a limpet on corners”

“Sure it was him”

“Absolutely. It was a chocolate brown X5, and there’s a matching car registered to him in our car park permit system. It's not a common colour”

Steve picked up the phone

“Can you find out, discretely, if Joyce Parmenter is in work today. Branch 237”

But, no, she wasn’t.

“Do we have enough evidence to have him intercepted at an airport?”

It was nearly afternoon when she finally wandered back to her desk, and it was only then that she noticed that Darren had his two sons with him. She’d been given no specific instruction on confidentiality, but she was sure they were trusting her to exercise a certain level of caution and common sense.

She decided to bottle her antagonism and slowly meandered towards his desk.

“On childcare duty as well?” she said sensitively. He looked up desolately, not expecting sympathy, and certainly not from her

“I’m sorry about Joyce”

“Joyce? Vicki, I don’t even know where she is”

“I do…. She’s in Stranraer police station. She was intercepted boarding the Irish ferry with her accomplice”

She watched Darren’s head fall to his hands in despair, but turned away and headed to the cafe for some lunch.

Despite that or maybe because of it, or maybe just due to their mutual antagonism, Darren was having another go at her. But this time his tack was slightly different having failed so miserably before

“Vicki. I need your expertise on this new system for Simon......”

“Later, maybe, Darren. Not now, please....Ohhh. Darren, just delay it. Shelve it. Later I’ll talk you through the reasons sometime, but it wont do what Simon wants because it will never have an acceptable response time…”

Darren backed off. Maybe she’d already looked at the spec….

But she was absorbed back into the thing she was previously engrossed in. Tristan had introduced her to a whole new world of lower level concepts in response to Mal’s restrictions, and these now looked all too familiar in the code she was now deciphering, and that night she phoned Tristan

Asterisk plus

They’d arranged the date for Saturday and he was about to hang up thinking the call was finished before she said

“Tris, talk me through asterisk plus coding”

Tristan hesitated. Talk through it! Wow. If ever a technique was designed to destroy entire operating systems, this was it

“Vicki, it’s easy to describe and fiendishly difficult to use. The asterisk is code for exactly where you are in memory. The plus is in bytes from that point and it will work with any instruction. Think about the machine code level. If you were just a computer would you understand what you were meant to do. You use it to add a number of bytes onto your current address and act on the address that that represents.

“So you could dynamically change an instruction by using an XR on a particular location. Like a hex 58, a load register?”
“Yes. If you’re familiar with the bit configuration of that instruction and you could guarantee you knew exactly where it was every time”

“Oh, I think I can do that. Tris, at the weekend, can you go through some machine code with me. I’m going to reverse engineer it back into Assembler. I think I know the answer already, but this will prove it”.

Monday morning and Darren was in late and looking decidedly downbeat. Vicki had extracted the particularly short skirt she’d bought on that first day with Tristan just because she felt on top of the world with all her results validated. But despite his pestering over the previous three months, it seemed that he hardly noticed. Not until Oliver strode in

“Ah, there you are. Looks like you’re becoming something of a trouble maker!”

“You don’t mean me, Oliver, surely?”

Yes! There’s a place for people like you, muttered Darren, its in the job centre with a P45

“You’re currently needed in the Boardroom to explain a few things”

“Boardroom?”

“Darren, some of us have got it. Some, just don’t”

“I don’t suppose you want my job do you?” Oliver asked rhetorically as they headed for the lift

“No way Oliver! Its stressful enough knowing what’s going wrong in this company without having the responsible for fixing it”

The Boardroom issue was about the offshore accounts. No embarrassing demonstrations, no accusations of theft. Just an explanation of how the issue was discovered and why it had never been found before, and she was back at her desk fifteen minutes later

“You didn’t last long in there, did you”

“Long enough. I’m not actually a Board member. Not yet. But I’m surprised you’re still here”

“Well I am. And no thanks to you. And I’m staying. And I’m giving you formal notification that I’ve asked for authority to dismiss you”

“Dismiss! What for?”

“Insubordination. And not doing any tangible work for 4 months”

“4 months? Don’t be silly, I’ve written the CCI in those 4 months – and no help from you or that accomplice of yours Mal Bryant. In that time I’ve produced something very valuable. And that’s been despite you. That is not how this department is supposed to work”

“So where is this CCI of yours then. There’s no sign of it anywhere in production, and its not in the testing library either. And you’ve not applied for any of the security permissions you’d need to run it because they would all come through me”

“Is that so. I can do my job perfectly well without your interference. And you can’t stop me because you don’t know enough about anything to do that. I think I’ll just leave you to figure it all out for yourself. I’ve not been invited to all those meetings with the board directors to talk about the weather or the price of fish, you know. And I’ve just finished a really interesting bit of code to cross-check the branch detail system totals to the Treasury values”

She watched him go white as he reached for his phone and glanced over several times as he clearly was getting no consolation from either of his calls

“Where do you think you’re off to now?”
“I’ve got a meeting at 12 with our Regulation Director, and I do not intend to be late”

“Well I’m coming too. If its an official meeting, I should know about it as your manager”

But the fifth floor was not a place he was familiar with. Or the people that lived there. She knocked once at a door and went in

“Oh, Hi Vicki. Steve is running ten late. Can I get you coffee while you wait?”

“Yes please”

She moved to the coffee pot on the filing cabinet, continuing “He’s on the phone to Eric. And how can I help you sir?” she asked turning to Darren

But Darren had no time to answer

“Oh hello, Oliver” she said now ignoring Darren for the new comer

“Ah, Vicki. Just who I wanted to see. I want you to consider how we should present the offshore funds issue to the Regulator. Your part would be how we found it, and how we prevent it in future. My part will be how we resolve it. The initial meeting will be in a fortnight. I’ll send you an invitation”
“Thanks, Oliver. But I might not still be here. My boss is going to sack me”

“He’s what! That is a dangerously foolish thing to even consider. So who is that?”

She had no compunction whatsoever of introducing Darren as Steve finally arrived from the inner office

Oliver turned to address Darren directly

“Mr Parmenter. Vicki Smallwood is one of the most valuable assets this company possesses. You would be wise to consider that good managers will recognise rising stars, encourage them and benefit from their efforts whereas poor managers will treat them simply as a threat. You appear to be in the latter category. Sack Vicki? The mere idea is that of an imbecile. Eric, we need to reconsider the organisation in your IT department. There’s something seriously wrong with it. Steve, I thought your meeting with Vicki was this afternoon?”

“Oliver, it is afternoon. I was intending to take her to lunch. I had invited Eric as well but he has another immediate priority. Unless, you’re free for an hour?”
“Vicki, there are few things I’d rather do than take lunch with you. However, I am already overdue for my meeting with the non-execs and we’re in enough trouble as it is. Eric, maybe you could brief me later?”
“I might just let Vicki do that herself”

“3 o’clock?”

Eric was livid. Yes, he’d already recognised that something needed to be done, but it was seriously embarrassing that he’d not had the time to take action before the situation became apparent to Oliver

“And what is your business here on the fifth floor?” he demanded of Darren

“Eh. Em. Sorry, I was just leaving”
“Yes. And expect an invitation to discuss your recent behaviour”

Vicki had no real idea what to expect next, but considered it a success to have prevented herself from laughing out loud when the CEO had dismissed Darren as an irrelevance.

This lunchtime meeting with Steve all stemmed from her early comments to Eric about consistency, security and integration. If these factors were taken into account while projects were being conceived there would be a major opportunity for cost efficiency both during development and in operation. Oliver was now taking an increasing interest in the IT department structure, and Eric knew that Vicki had been stirring it up pointing out that the entire remaining management following the takeover knew little or nothing about the operational systems, or how to run a department significantly bigger than they were used to.

Independently, he, Steve and Oliver had come to the same conclusion. Who else could do this co-ordination? And most companies didn’t, but was that because they didn’t have a suitable candidate? Someone with integrity who would put the best interests of the company first, who knew the computer systems, who knew the business processes and who believed that this was important and cost efficient? But the Bank did have someone who matched all those qualifications and it would be brainless not to use her. The only obstacle was persuading Vicki to take it on.

Maybe this interview should be done by the IT director, but they had decided that the invitation coming from Audit and Regulation would have more impact on this particular individual, and wasn’t that what it was about? – being specific and personal?

She was concerned about this lunch. She hardly knew Steve, although she thought they’d managed to get onto the same wavelength in the meetings they’d been in together and he’d gone along with her melodramatic demonstration which in retrospect was being considered rather risqué. But he seemed only too pleased to discuss his two children, both at Oxford University and his wife who was an auditor with an accountancy firm. She also discovered that they were family friends with Eric and they had dinner together about once a month. But after asking her a little about herself he moved the conversation back to business and in particular some recent comments that she’d made to Eric about the way IT development was organised. He was, he said, interested in her view on how to improve it.

They talked about her ideas that she’d already briefly mentioned to Eric that the implications on the rest of the business should be considered before allowing any project to proceed. Which, she said would also mean that they were all run in a co-ordinated program rather than a bunch of random initiatives. Then, with all the information about all the developments in one place, they could work together with the overall objective of creating and using one version of the truth rather than disparate subsets of information all over the place with dubious data quality and accuracy.

“So why are you not doing this already”

“Because to do that you need someone who has an in-depth knowledge of many if not all of the IT systems, and that person needs to know what the business is trying to achieve and what their processes are, and they need to know how all this fits together”

“But you already know all that, so I repeat, why aren’t you doing it?”

“Because my job is to code programs to produce a defined result. I’m supposed to be part of Darren Parmenter’s team”

“Although you’ve been moving out of that remit recently”

“I’ve always tried to help the other programmers, so long as I wasn’t seen to be interfering, especially when they run into difficulties on interfaces or conflicts with other systems. And, well, someone ought to. Its only because Darren has been so actively obstructive that I’ve had to go my own way”

“So maybe Dominic or Darren should take this up”

“Darren joined us from Northern Cities in the takeover. That was a much smaller bank and the way they work is probably ok for a small operation but it’ll have trouble scaling up to this larger company. So many of the developments at the moment are hitting ‘unforeseen circumstances’. Steve, they were unforeseen because no-one was looking and that might be because it isn’t anybody’s job to look and in a smaller company it would have become evident sooner. Dominic is a financial administrator. He’s largely non technical”

“But if we implemented something like you just described, we could include that as something we’ve identified to prevent a repeat of the offshore issue when we are asked to defend ourselves with the Regulator”

“I expect so. There’s nothing we can do about the history, but it could be one of the measures we’re implementing as a result”

“So….Vicki…. Would you take this job on?”

She sighed deeply “Steve, I’d love to take this on. It’s the opportunity to get our systems properly under control and properly supporting those poor guys on the front line – whether its in retail, contact centre or getting grilled by the Regulator. But, Steve, while I think I’ve got the knowledge of the systems, and of the business and what its trying to achieve in each of its departments, and I’ve got the aptitude and even the attitude, to do that job properly you need someone with the authority to make decisions and say no although ‘no’ with a whole bunch of good reasons would be preferable. Sometimes pet ideas from directors would have to be rejected. And I’d be doomed to failure because I’m just a level 5. While it’s a good concept, its catch 22. Anyone with enough knowledge – like me - would be too junior and anyone senior enough – like Dominic - would not have the depth and breadth of technical knowledge”

Back at her desk she felt sadder and more contemplative than she could remember. The recent events were exciting and infuriating, but not sad. The CCI would be just another program and would be handed over to someone like Audrey to operate. And even on the personal side, dumping Pete wasn’t sad, just necessary. Still, it was nice that Steve liked her ideas and that Eric had clearly talked to him about it. And maybe if it was all implemented, it would become a better place to work. They needed this Design Authority, but it had to be at Dominic’s level, not hers. And there was no-one left following the takeover who came anywhere near the profile. She could ask to be promoted to level 8 but that would be like giving her some personal credit for recent events, and somehow she decided that was unlikely.

“There’s no one left who could do it” she said rather rashly to Eric, suddenly realising that he could take that as a criticism.

“Did Steve suggest that you worked for him in Audit to do this job, rather than stay in IT?”

“No. Although that might work for a while, but then I’d get out of date”

“Interesting. You see, we used to have someone that did this, back in the early days. He was way before your time though. Adrian Amery he was called, and he moved to Audit”

“So who took over from him?”

“No-one. There was no-one else who had sufficient technical knowledge and business credibility”

Amery again. Some of that code he put in for the testing system is really weird. Why would he make it that complicated? So complicated that no-one would ever be able to update it? Must have been a programming genius, so why move to Audit?

Darren had changed tack again

“Vicki, could you tell me when you expect to have time to do some scheduled work rather than behaving like a private investigator?”

She lobbed her pen onto the desk and turned in her chair to look up towards him

“You know, Darren….” she said quite sadly “… there’s a lot of people out there making a lot of money by defrauding this bank. I've found several million pounds in losses that we’ve now put a stop to and I’m quite certain that there’s several million still out there. I’ve been working in the very best interests of my employer and hopefully even the Regulator will be impressed. However, all it does is cause me grief. If it’s not Eric telling me he’ll have another heart attack, its some other misdemeanour that sets Oliver up for another pasting from the Regulator, or it’s you getting on my case for not contributing to your schedule. So I’m not going to look for any more”

Darren stopped. Woebegone. That was a different perspective, and in a quiet conversational tone! From what he’d heard from Dominic, the value of Vicki’s efforts had been a true £35 million. Maybe there would be some personal benefit to himself if he simply allocated this work to her. She was doing it anyway. It would remove the friction. It would reflect that he, personally, had nothing to hide, and Eric and Oliver were clearly on this side, so he’d be joining the winning team - even if he didn’t have an invitation.

It was late and she was now on her own in the office. Dominic had just dropped by seeing that the lights were still on, but had moved on swiftly seeing who it was.

Her previous DPM had once told her that if he hauled 500 people off the street, he’d be lucky if 50 of them would be able to learn to write Cobol, perhaps 5 would handle PL/1 and its unlikely that even one of them could handle Assembler. How many would ever understand machine code? How many would ever want to?

So how many people in this department would understand this code of Aidrian’s? They all write Cobol, a few sometimes use PL/1, but this?

Sometimes they bring their code to me if they don’t understand the errors they’re getting, and I look at the Assembler listing. But the machine code? No, no-one else will understand it. No-one has found this before, not since Adrian Amery coded it at least 8 years ago. This new dodge was very different. To understand this you would need a decent knowledge of hexadecimal arithmetic and character codes and the way the system uses them. You’d need a knowledge of the machine code and instruction formats down to the individual bit level, and how to change them dynamically without going to all the trouble of writing code and compiling it. This is by some margin the most technical thing I’ve ever come across. I’m thinking that I would have trouble describing how this works to the guys who already have a significant programming background, but I do know someone that will understand it and double check it for me. And we are due to meet anyway.

Tristan was intrigued. This needed serious concentration, but Vicki seemed to have a handle on it already

“So how do you guarantee you know where the code is?”
“Because its in a test record in the main database. The system reads that test account in to the normal data input buffer. It contains all the data you’d expect and everything works. But then this code has been inserted into the middle of it. Anyone looking at this in a dump would find the characters they were looking for and that would be that. They’d assume that the rest of this is just a random bunch of hex that has never been zeroed. But follow it through…”

“Ok, So this branches to the address in register 10. That’s the input buffer for the next record to be processed, so that’s as expected. Ok, Vicki, and that takes it up here. Look, there’s the next previous instruction that sets register 10”
“Yes, except it doesn’t”
“Vicki, its pretty clear in the listing”
“I know Tris, but way back at the start, look, that xr instruction, asterisk plus 74 - dynamically amends that to register 11”
“But that’s the address of the next field in the input data”

“Yes, because that’s where this code is. All that random hex, its not random at all. It sets up an entry in the test record that shows £50 000 was paid in. Then it goes straight to creating a payment record, so the 50k goes out to Nat West. Its got an account number and a name, so Nat West have no reason to query it. But its never actually been in this Bank so no-one would ever find it even if you went through all the transactions in the entire customer database one by one. And that amount has not been deducted from any other account, so no-one will notice any loss. It didn’t exist coming in to the Bank. It only exists on output, and the other totals all cross check. It gets paid into Nat West, but there’s nothing suspicious about it. This is no ordinary fiddle – its got a name. It's called Amery. To be more precise, Adrian Amery. Adrian Amery used to work here. He was one of the original programmers when the Bank first introduced computers and changed from manual processes. Tris, he’s the Adrian who built the test system, hence its identifiers. Remember?”

It Must be Real

“So Vicki, this Amery pinches 50 000 pounds from the Bank every month. Nice work if you can get it!”
“You might look at it that way. But I’m not so sure. That 50 000 doesn’t really exist. Its not as if some trader had made that money and Adrian’s nicking it off him. No-one is losing out. Whose was it before Adrian? No-one’s”

“You mean because its just a line on a computer ledger, it isn’t actually real”
“Not quite. Its not because it isn’t real, its because it never was real. When all the money comes in to the Branches it belongs to someone, its hard earned cash. But after it goes to Treasury, it goes back out to the Branches and gets given to someone else in exchange for a negative value in a line on the computer ledger. Even if you take 1500 20 pound notes into the Branch and deposit them, you wont be able to come up here to head office and look at them stacked neatly in a vault. That 30 000 pounds becomes just a transaction on the computer and a line in the ledger that’s added to whatever you had before that. But beyond that it has no physical existence”

“But Vicki, you could say that for all financial transactions”
“Yes, and some more than others. Like if Al buys some stocks, he doesn’t actually pay for them. Then he sells them before settlement day at the end of the month. But he doesn’t have anything tangible and never did have. Its not as if he took possession of these share certificates and then passed them on. Its all just add, subtract and add the remainder on to a different total. No-one has made a loss. Only Al has made a gain.

And think about the value of the Bank! It’s the total as added up over years and years with transactions coming in and going out and interest earned and various deals in stocks and shares and insurance… You can’t rock into the vault and start counting. Its as good as a fictitious number picked out of the air and certainly couldn’t be verified to the nearest 50 grand. Its only counted in tens of millions”

“Ok, I guess. But a lot of people will see things differently”

“Yes, they will. Because anything can become the truth if enough people believe it – like religion. But I still maintain that you cant steal it if no-one owns it, and because it doesn’t relate to any physical deposit like cash in a Branch, or theoretical deposit like Al’s profit margin on shares then no-one can complain that they’re losing out. Its not coming out of anyone’s account either individually or collectively”

“I agree that its unlikely that anyone will ever find out because no-one has any reason to start looking”
“Exactly. However, just in case they do, I’m going to use the same technique to drop 80 million onto the value of the company by adding it to the investment reserve account. Then if anyone does say something I can expose the Bank as having overstated its value for however long, which I know the Regulator will take a very dim view of. And it would inevitably throw into question whether this had ever happened before as well!”

“Yes, to the extent that the Bank may prefer a closed door cover-up. Vicki, it’s a bit like the electronic version of counterfeiting”

“Could be. So if I photocopied a 20 pound note so perfectly that no-one – even the Bank of England - could tell the difference, who would lose out? No-one. My 20 would just go in and out of shops and purses and banks and wallets until it wore out and was replaced by one from the Royal Mint”

“Yes, but they regulate how much money is in circulation”

“I think they’re deluded. There must be millions of pounds in tins and jars and piggy banks and shoe boxes under beds. Me adding my forged 20 to the pot will only compensate for a trivial fraction of what’s not circulating. But because this is purely digital, an exact copy is relatively straightforward”

But the bottom line was that it worked, and it had worked every time. And it worked even though a program was changed or a new system or whole computer or operating system upgrade was installed. And that's because all the code was embedded in testing account records. The testing system would be reused so that backwards compatibility was ensured. Like, the results from the new system were the same as the old system in the same circumstances. These accounts were already in all the databases and that's why the same testing system is used - including all this stuff. Anyone but a programmer with knowledge of the lowest levels of machine code would dismiss this jumble of hexadecimal as just some random stuff that existed in an uncleared sector of memory. No one would suspect it actually meant something. And even then, they’d give up when they got to an asterisk-plus, ‘exclusive or’ coding instruction. Its just too complex. And risky. In any re-compilation of a program you could never guarantee that you’d end up with exactly the same machine code as before. But this code was different. Embedded in testing records it was always at the same offset from the start of the data input buffer.

Vicki returned to inventing the balance of the £80 million. It would take three or four days so that no-one in Investments noticed, but that could be monitored, and stopped if necessary. But Eric would give that problem to her anyway…

And now…All I need to do is change the output user account number to my account, and I end up 50 000 pounds a month richer. The only person that will notice is Adrian Amery and even if he asks, which is unlikely because that would blow his cover, I'll tell him that the whole testing system was realigned following the takeover so that may have upset his dodge. But I’ll deny all knowledge of this entire system. And I’m not even stealing it because it doesn’t exist in the first place.

But Amery didn’t complain. Maybe he didn’t know who to complain to or what exactly to complain about. She didn’t know, so he almost certainly didn’t know her. Now this would simply sit there increasing every month without anyone else ever noticing it.

The coding updates worked. Comparatively, it was such a simple change and only to create text characters even if they were created using a series of exclusive-or instructions, but even if it was wrong it would only print out incorrectly – or try to access a non-existent account.

And, in test at least, the numbers were there. Just sitting on a statement waiting to be reduced by whatever she dreamed of buying. How do you spend £50 000 a month? What on earth do you buy?

New Direction

“So, Vicki, what of this little job that Steve mentioned last week. Any thoughts on it?”

“You know, Oliver, I think it’s a good idea because I raised it first with Eric. Single version of the truth. Projects not competing with each other, massive savings on database licencing. But then I considered the practicalities. Its too big a step. It heralds in a culture change where departments won’t be in total control any more. People like Simon will find that difficult if not impossible. All the directors are encouraged to do as well as they can individually and that has created an unofficial league table of how well the departments do against each other, and that prevents them working in co-operation with each other. It’s a contributary factor in not taking down-stream efficiency into account. The structure of IT would have to change radically too, and the guys who could implement this all left during the takeover. The last four months has been a war zone. Some folks say that life is a battle. You have to fight for everything. But I don’t want to do that. I just want to do a good job without people trying to trip me up or stab me in the back. Oliver, following the takeover, this company has none of that. Team spirit has gone, competitiveness prevails. Mean nasty people will always prevail by riding roughshod over kind gentle people who in turn are too nice to return the favour. This is not the sort of place I want to spend the majority of my waking hours.

Its just not somewhere I want to be anymore. I’m telling you, because you’ve been kind enough to listen when I’ve been doing my best to drop several million pounds onto the company bottom line, even if you do think of me as a trouble maker. But I’m a programmer. I needed to show everyone what the CCI was capable of and how valuable it was. I’m not a sleuth. Its not me that should be tracking down Joyce Parmenter and her dodgy side hustle. I was determined to do a good job. I need to do that to maintain my own self esteem. What I don’t need and wont tolerate is being obstructed in the job I’ve been asked to do by people who are supposed to act like team-mates. After his treatment of me, why is Darren Parmenter still employed here? So instead. I’m leaving. I’m changing direction and having a baby.

I addressed my letter to Eric because there are no line managers in IT that are worth the time of day, but he’s out so I’ll drop it onto Maria’s desk instead”

Disaster! Thoughts crowded his head. How could he now handle the meeting with the Regulator? He’d now have to trust Audrey to find the millions they all now knew was still walking out of the Bank unnoticed. Why did Eric have such a worthless department structure? Disconsolately, he meandered into the Treasury office

“I don’t suppose anyone here has any good news, do they?”

“Actually, Oliver, we were expecting a slight dip of around 15 million this month, but it appears that we are 65 ahead”

Three doors along the corridor she tapped twice and entered without an invitation, dropping the envelope onto the surprised desk

“Its my resignation. I will leave today”

“I’m sorry? Oh Dear! Is there not something we can do to rectify this. You’ve been doing such a wonderful job!”

“No, Maria. I’ve just been a trouble maker, and what I’ve been doing is really nothing to do with IT. And Darren Parmenter should not just be sacked for his behaviour, he should be hung drawn and quartered”
“Vicki, Eric does have an interview scheduled with him on that subject”

“Yes. But he’s too late now”

“Are you not on a month’s notice”
“Who knows! But it cant be enforced anyway. I’m not staying a minute longer”

She cleared her few personal possessions from her desk, and now it was time to go. She considered for a minute if she’d forgotten anything. This move was terminal, so no second chances as the phone rang

“I’ll definitely be back in Brum tomorrow” Tristan apologised “I’ve explained it to Al. Of course he’s not over the moon, but it’s a matter of priorities. I’m giving him no choice”
“Don’t Tris. You don’t have to. I’ll meet you in the City this evening. What about that cellar wine bar in Threadneedle Street?”
“Really! That’s fantastic”

“And Tris, I wont be coming back here either”
“You mean, you quit. Like you always said you might. I hope you were polite about it!”
“Maybe not. Sometimes it’s just a lot harder to find nice ways of saying things rather than behaving like a blunt instrument. And being nice opens the door for someone to persuade you against it with some pathetic tale of woe”

Ok. Double check – cleared desk, sorted out the HR system for Marcia, written two whole pages on why Simon’s outline specification would never work. Yes. Signed on as Darren immediately after he’d gone home yesterday and deleted the entire CCI library? Done. Its only by using something like that CCI that anyone would ever find the Adrian Amery dodge, and there’s no-one else here could ever write it.

She picked up her coat and handbag

“Oi!” called Darren interrupting his phone call “Where do you think you’re going. Its only just gone three o’clock”

“London. Threadneedle Street to be more precise”

“I don’t think so. I need to talk to you about your new assignment”

“No. What you need to do is try holding your breath till I get back”

“Oh yes. And when will that be”
“It won’t. I quit. And don’t you go pretending you’re sorry. I know for sure you’ll be glad to see the back of me. You were going to sack me anyway”
“I need a letter from you”
“A letter? I’ll double that. You can have two! They’re O and F in the ratio 3 to 1”

“And you need to hand over the CCI to someone before you go”

“No. I’ll leave that to you. After all you’re the technical manager round here.”

He stood, nervously shaking. Was she serious?

“Maria’s got my letter”

“You still need to copy me on it”

“No I don’t. I only need to tell someone in my management line. And I’ve told Oliver. Eric is out”

“What about me. I’m …”

“…An irrelevance. No. I drop over 40 million pounds to the bottom line of this company. And over 18 on an annual basis, and the only hint of a bonus coming my way was continual grief from you. So no. You can all poke it. But the official line is I’m going to have a baby”

“You need to hand over the CCI. Dominic needs it for the Regulator and nobody else…”

“Too bad. You should have thought about that before now and treated me better when you had the chance”

“Vicki. Vicki…” but raising his voice did nothing to prevent her closing the door behind her.

With Pete she was looking forward to having a baby in maybe a couple of years and settling down into the rut of normality. But with Tristan she was looking forward to every single day as a separate excitement, each with its potential for barely controlled humour and fun.

And she wouldn’t have to fight for it.

The money transferred directly to a numbered Swiss account. Then to a private Barbados account, and then some of it was used to pay off the balance on a credit card from National Bank of Trinidad and Tobago.

She was teaching herself to sail and lay back against the cabin of her little yacht. Even if this went on for ten years it would still only be worth a fraction of what she’d found for them. Even at that it was a good deal. So now she’d lie back and relax. Tristan would be joining her next week when he’d finished the piece of work that he’d promised Al. Then she’d think about really having that baby. Or maybe not.

End of Amery

Epilogue

Back in 1978-9 there was a message that kept appearing on the main operations console at the Midland Household Stores (MHS) Computing Centre in Nottingham. All it said was ‘Haven’t found me yet’. It continued to appear rather randomly even though all the main circuit cards and processors in the computer were changed, the operating system reloaded several times and upgraded to a newer version.

It never caused any damage and as far as I know no-one ever found it, but it was done by dynamically manipulating the contents of test database records.

Its also the way that the ‘Parrot Sketch’ that I included in the Invoice Reconciliation system – purely for training purposes of course. But no-one ever manged to delete it despite several attempts to find it.

Its also why a blue Fiat 124 S reg number BCY325K never picked up any speeding tickets or parking fines.

dave